Well. That didn’t work out as planned.

So, I gained 5 pounds this month. I didn’t weigh the first 2 Fridays, and the Friday when I got back from San Francisco I was up 5 pounds. Then I went down 2 & back up 2. I’d say I gained a couple, then 3 more in SF, then I’ve maintained.

While there are some good things I’ve done (exercise is happening more frequently, continuing to work on diet, meeting with the health coach) there have been plenty of instances of emotional eating and I haven’t started doing weights. Weights are critical to my success.

Time to dig dip and just take it day by day.

I would like to be down 25 pounds when we go on vacation in 26 weeks. That will require consistency over “the long haul”.

“I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed.” – Michael Jordan

Snap out of it!

Last night I cried and went to bed. I swear, there are times I can’t help but wonder if I don’t suffer from manic depression. Obviously not sever since I am (for the most part!) a functional member of society without medication. And having friends who suffer the disease, I have seen how difficult it can be to function without medication for some people. (Isn’t it great how we’re the only industrialized nation in the world that doesn’t make sure it’s citizens have access to medical care. Don’t get me started.)

But I suffer these mood swings and I’m left looking for an explanation and sometimes I just can’t find one. Right now I just feel tired & defeated. Part of it is being back to winter weather, I’m run down b/c I’m fighting off something (the fever blister on my lip is always a clear indicator that my immune system is working overtime), but really I can’t think of a rational explanation for my mood. Sometimes I wonder who’s in the emotional driver seat around this place!

ANYWAY. My lunchtime walking buddy is back after being out of the office for 2 weeks (2 out of state deaths in the family), so we are walking at lunch again. I am going to have to walk in the afternoon – mornings are too cold again. Also, I lost the power cord to my MP3 player so I haven’t had music for doing cardio or access to my cardio coach workouts. I ordered one and it arrived, so I have workout music again!

Hub is going to work on the hall bath this weekend, I am going to continue to organize around the house. The cleaning lady comes today ($75 per month well spent IMO), so it will be clean and I can focus on organizing & small projects.

A year (or more) ago I bought a handmade fabric purse off etsy. I love it! The fabrics are appropriate for spring or fall (tans, muted greens, that sort of thing) but I felt like it didn’t match in winter. But it’s the perfect size. I pulled out some wool & an old Simplicity pattern and made myself a similar purse for winter. I like it so well that I bought a couple of fat quarters so I can make myself one for summer too. Not sure when I’ll do that, but I am tickled with my black wool one!

In the meantime, I will just force myself to mush one and know I’ll pop out the other side of this emotional black hole soon and I don’t want to have gained too much weight!

I will post the ji gae recipe – I really do need to sit down & write it out so I can replicate the performance!

Have a good day!

It’s my blog and I’ll rant if I want to

Okay, the weather is crappy, it’s supposed to SNOW this weekend, and my family all need a boot in the backside!

I am rather disgusted with my whole eating this past weekend. And last night. I’m killing myself to make healthy meals, my house is a wreck, and so I’m eating crap to comfort myself. Truly the human mind is a strange place.

I felt icky Monday and stayed home. I did a few things around the house and was feeling better. Hub came home early not feeling well. I was mad because I wanted to be by myself.

He was really sick with a nasty stomach virus and stayed home yesterday. I took him to the doctor. I worked really hard – working from home and doing stuff around the house.

I made a really good dinner which the boy refused to eat because it didn’t have meat. He was supposed to clean the kitchen and did a crap job. I went to the stab-n-go for beer.

Work up in the middle of the night with insomnia, then overslept this morning. Hub stayed home again.

Gee, dontcha love weeks when you diet & exercise your way UP the scale???

I have a long list of things about which I am angry right now. These include:

I am tired of this treasurer job and ready to pass the proverbial buck.

My hall bath has been torn up since Thanksgiving weekend. I am ready to hire a contractor to finish the damn thing I’m so sick of it. Oh yeah, my husband is a contractor.

I am (still) angry that I had to drive his mom home while he went & played D&D. I realize he’s entitled to a break, but why should he have one when I never get one?

I want it to be warm weather so I can get outside and walk without my ears and nose snapping off.

With the exception of one activity in February, we are not going anywhere until that damn hall bathroom is done. I don’t care if I sound like I’m being his mommy or his boss, I’m sick of it.

Guess what we’re having tonight for dinner? Last night’s leftovers. I’ll stick a piece of boiled chicken on the boy’s plate & tell him to have at it.

I realize I sound like a shrew. I feel like one too.

WHEN WILL IT BE SPRING???????

When will I learn?

Busted butt around the house this weekend. Met a friend for lunch Sunday, ordered a beer with mine, and spent the rest of the day laying around & consuming crap. Sigh.

The scale is up 3 pounds.

Happy Friday!

This has been a good (but long) week. Hub and I have walked every day but one since Sunday. My weight is down 2 pounds. Vegetable consumption is up.

Last night I made kim chi ji gae (korean cabbage stew) for dinner. My husband got that look on his face - pure bliss. This stuff is uber expensive to order in restaurants (not that we have a good korean restaurant nearby) and it is so good - and healthy! I can't believe it came out that good on my first try!!!

My plans for the weekend are to pick up my house and take down the Christmas ornaments (yeah, I know....)

Have a good one!

I guess I needed that!

Tuesday I ended up ahving to work late, and when I got home I fell across the bed & fell asleep for half an hour! So, no kettlebell class. :-( Luckily they have one every week and next week's is Saturday morning - which will be easier.

I have walked every day with hub and I am so proud of him! Yesterday afternoon we took the dogs with us as well and it was really nice. I hope the boy will start coming with us also, but he seems to have hit a moody patch just lately. Not sure if it's exams or the fact that one of his wisdom teeth places got infected (again!) or just hormones. I know he won't walk mornings, but afternoons when we walk the dogs would be nice.

I found a great new web site www.vegandad.blogspot.com. No, we aren't going strictly vegan, but it's easier to afford organic when we're using less animal products - not to mention we feel better because it forces us to eat more vegetables and beans!

Anyway, things here are chugging along. I have an appointment tomorrow with our on site health coach. I'll keep you posted!

Catching Up

The rest of our trip was 1) medieval group stuff followed by 2) a trip back into the city for a bit more sight seeing (with me driving so hub could gawk) and a lovely Russian dinner.

I still haven’t gotten everything put away and my house needs a serious organization session, but the vacation was well worth it!

On the job front: hub is still working but it’s kind of “day by day.” They finished up a major construction project for a local university, and the university has been keeping his company on to make changes and do some repairs. He really has no idea how long this will last, but it certainly beats unemployment. But it certainly stressful to feel like you have this ax over your head and no idea when it will fall! So, exercise and de-stressing is really important!

I ordered a set of book from Dr. Joel Furman and began reading them. I want hub to read at least some of the info, and I’ve been sharing what I’m reading. Over the weekend I really solicited his feedback but developed very nutritious breakfasts and lunches for him. His breakfast is a bean patty (with a bit of sausage for flavor) topped with an egg & hot sauce on an English muffin. Then he has 3 pieces of fruit and a large vegetable & bean salad with sliced avocado for lunch. I also sent some soup today. His body is adjusting to the amount of raw vegetables. Ahem.

This week I’m having a slice of German sunflower seed rye for breakfast with hummus, carrot, cucumber, and spinach. Snacks are 6-8 almonds with a piece of fruit and lunch is the same cauliflower salad with avocado as hub. Overall I’d say were doing well, although I did get MAD at him and have beer & cheese dip Sunday. Sigh. How is that logical???

Hub has walked with me for the past 3 days!!!! He is slow and we are doing a mile, but we are walking!!! My goal is to walk in the AM, then walk the dogs 3 times per week in the afternoon. He’s working on that before he tries to add the gym in to the mix. I told him right now the main thing is nutrition, followed by simply establishing the habit.

My gym is offering kettlebell classes. No idea of the quality, but I am going to one tonight to check it out! I’ll report back!

I’d like to lose 25-30 pounds this year – hub needs to lose around 60 (but it doesn’t look like that much because he’s huge and built like a linebacker!). He has high blood pressure. The past couple of times I’ve had mine checked it’s been elevated – that’s a new development and one I don’t like!!! I haven’t mentioned it to anyone (I don’t go to my dr until next month) – I know not saying it doesn’t make it not true, but maybe this newfound dedication to diet & exercise will help. I know this morning I would not have gotten out of bed if I hadn’t been walking with hub, so having a partner really does help.

I left my waistline in San Francisco

When the hub got home from work last Wednesday, he arrived to find me cutting out a giant raven from black wool. I remembered that I had a fair amount of black wool I purchased some years back for 50 cents per pound at a fabric warehouse going out of business sale. I wouldn’t have to worry about finishing the edges! So I cut it out & pinned it on, then threw the puppy into my carry on – I needed to finish it before Saturday.

Our flight left at 7 Thursday and was uneventful. I worked on the sewing in the Atlanta airport and our flight left early enough that we were not impacted by the delays & cancellations caused by snowy weather. We arrived in SF about 1:30, collected our bags & rental car, and headed for the hotel. I had printed out directions, but it’s been a while since I’ve driven in the thick of big city downtown traffic, so I was glad I wasn’t driving!

Is there anything more civilized than pulling up to your hotel and being met by a bellman and valet, waiting to assist you? No, there is not. We stayed in the Hilton in Union Square – I highly recommend it. I upgraded our free continental breakfast to the buffet for $10, and my room was upgraded for free. We had a king size bed on the 36th floor with a balcony overlooking the bay. Very nice.

We sat down, had a beer & nested for a bit, then walked the couple of blocks over to Chinatown. We walked pretty much the entire length, poking into shops & checking out side streets. Near the end, we found what we were looking for: a restaurant with poultry hanging in the window & no white faces in sight. Ah, Chinese food, with hot tea. On the way back I stopped in a shop to pick up my mom’s gift: miniature food for her dollhouse (oh, I picked out a bento box with rice & sushi for my house!).

We called our friend E (who we were out there visiting), told her not to eat, and headed for Berkely. We thought it was late, but traffic was still nuts. On the way to her house we drove past a Gracie ju jit su studio and hub seriously wanted to go in - for an autograph I think! Hee hee! Took our leftovers, had a good visit, but I was fading fast so we had to keep it short.

Friday we went down & had breakfast – I had a brotchen with meat & cheese from the “European” section of the buffet, followed by rice, miso soup, & salmon from the “Asian” section, and some wonderful fresh fruit. Why have bacon & eggs when I can have smoked salmon & miso????

Our hotel was right next to the cable car station, so we jumped on & headed down to the wharf, where we walked around quite a bit, had a great lunch (fresh Dungeness crab & clam chowder of course!) and bought the boy’s gift: a black wool fisherman’s cap. Then we rented a “go car” – sort of a motor scooter thingie with seats. It took us on a GPS /voice guided tour of downtown – it was a blast!!! After that I think we took a nap. :-)

Dinner was at a Korean place recommended by a friend. What can I say? WE LOVE KOREAN FOOD!!!

Saturday we got up, ruefully ate our last meal at the breakfast of goodness, and went upstairs so I could finish sewing the buttons on the hub’s costume for that day. Then we said a tearful farewell to our lovely hotel, and headed across the bay to 12th Night.

To be continued….

We're back

Just a quick note to let you know we have safely returned home. I'll post in a day or two.

Some things that work

A lot of times I (and other people) write about the obstacles we face in achieving our goals. Which is perfectly normal and a great way to solicit ideas! But sometimes it’s good to write about success as well – it helps you remember what works so you can continue and reinforces that you can succeed!

Some recent successes and things that work:

Hub bought a new pair of walking shoes. I sat down and talked to him about my plans to actively turn my health into a “hobby” and I asked him to participate – specifically, I asked him to walk with me. His old walking shoes were worn out. Our son had a $25 gift certificate to a local show shop which hub used to buy new walking shoes. He thought up the idea himself – I didn’t have to prod him!

I made great strides this past year in decreasing my consumption of animal products and increasing my consumption of vegetables. One thing I read somewhere really stuck with me – “Instead of eliminating foods from your diet, crowd them out with new ones.” What a simple yet profound concept! Once I started basing a lot of my lunch ideas around beans with some grains thrown in, there really was no need for meat. Add avocado or olives (both yummy, decadent treats in my world!) to a meal and who needs cheese?

Spinach in my morning smoothie, wilted spinach as a side or in something (like spaghetti sauce), tossing a box of Green Giant vegetables into my lunch box (I stock up when they go on sale) have all been easy ways to incorporate more vegetables into my diet. Also, a snack I’ve enjoyed this past year was either hummus (I went on a kick with the single serving packs from Costco there for a while) or baba ganoush as a dip for vegetables - a great mid morning snack, not to mention cheap, easy, and majorly nutritious!

All in all, great strides in terms of nutrition in 2009!

So keep that going and focus on the exercise side of the equation now!

2010 – the year of de-stressing

My walking buddy and I were talking at lunch today about how 2009 started off in fear; the economy was bad & our company was laying off employees. Even though we are both still here, 2009 was a very stressful year! There was the whole national economy & fear of job loss, but also stress related to my hobby, stress related to what felt like a bazillion financial “emergencies”, fear of hub’s potential job loss, concern over his mom & her situation. No wonder I’m tired!

One of my big goals for this year is to proactively work on defusing stress through the use of exercise, yoga, meditation, positive imaging, and whatever else might work! There’s still stuff to be stressed about, but this year I want to do a better job of controlling my stress instead of letting it control me.

New Year, Same Me

I think “New Year, New You” is probably one of the most annoying article titles to ever be slapped on the cover of a magazine. I like the old me just fine!

Of course, there are things I’d like to be different this year, and there are things I’d like to do differently.

Last year I lost (and kept off) 25 pounds. My fitness level has improved. I’d like to build on that success.

The first part of the year we saved money – the second part of the year we spent money on necessary things like a new roof, a new heat pump, a car… Overall, I hope we can get all that paid off and start saving again. And no more financial emergencies this year please – we had more than our share last year!!!!

Work was good and I hope that continues!

Hub may be laid off next week. He’s been so happy with this company, I hate it. I hope he is happy with whatever comes his way.

My medieval re-enactment group was all too often annoying due to politics, personality conflicts, etc. I am stepping down from my treasurer job. One major responsibility I took on ended when my friend stepped down from her role (I was her assistant). I volunteered for another but wasn’t selected. Yeah, I’m a bit disappointed, but it is also an opportunity. This year I intend to put less time and effort into this and more time and effort into a new hobby.

Fitness is my new hobby for 2010. I am collecting and organizing my tools at home for home workouts in my room. I started out last year with good intentions (and success!), but got unfocused toward the end of the year. By divesting myself of other hobby priorities, I can focus on this, painting my house, and my doll house. All of which sound fun and very gratifying.

Rather than treating fitness as a chore or task, I am going to look at it as a leisure past time – read about aspects of it, learn, try, practice.

Hope you enjoy a wonderful new year!!!