Not really about working out
Yesterday I was really beat. The boy & I ran, but I couldn’t swim or lift weights. I was still obviously recovering from Sunday’s long run.
To make matters worse, I am not in a great place emotionally. Missing my husband very much , and dreading my half brother’s wedding in May. I am much older than my siblings from my dad’s second marriage, and going to these things makes me feel very alienated. At my sister’s wedding, I wasn’t even seated near the family, let alone with it. Part of me says ‘don’t go’ and the other part wants me to be a bigger person than that. Do you ever reach an age where Grace comes naturally? Heavy sigh.
I failed to make myself breakfast I was so busy washing dishes, so I grabbed a bacon & egg sandwich here. Other than that, eating has been what I brought from home. The part I hate most about PMS isn’t that I turn into a raving lunatic (that’s my husband’s least favorite part!) – it’s that I feel like that girl that ate the gum in ‘Willy Wonka” – ‘overinflated’ best describes it. Please God let this week end soon.
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I am really starting to believe that our emotional state has a serious effect on running ability. The first problem is the motivation problem, have a bad day at work, with the kids or spouse and see what happens to old Mr. Motivation – blaa. Upcoming events in our life which we dread, e.g. the wedding you mentioned or for me visits to my outlaws (I mean my in-laws), can have a serious impact on everything we do, especially fitness stuff. But these are the very days that we have to dig deep, gather up whatever is left of our chaotic selves and face the wind. I’ve had so many days like that and it never feels like it gets easier, but somehow I come to a point where I can say I made it through again.
A side note for your hubby, I have learned to go on extra long runs when my wife turns into a raving lunatic ;-) :-> Jack
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