Happy New Year

Well, I ended the month at the same weight I started it. Given my stress levels I guess that's not too bad. I lost a little over 21 pounds this year. Not great but not terrible. But I'm ready to wrap this up. Goal for January 6.5 pounds. We'll see.

Happy New Year!

Keeping it real

Just to keep it real, coming off those Christmas carbs SUCKS.

Home again

Well, it was a lovely Christmas. I'm back home. I think the hub and I are going to exchange gifts tonight - we'll see how he feels when he gets home. :-)

It was a nice trip, but now it's time to hit a couple of big goals: passing my PMP and hitting 140 on the scale. And since there is no time like the present I am starting today! Yes, we are eating Christmas dinner leftovers tonight (which I will enjoy), but I will eat a reasonable amount and I am going to walk the dogs and hit the gym today. The rest of the day is business as usual food wise and I have 2 study sessions planned in (I've already completed 1 this morning). Go me!

Happy holidays!

Balance

I find this time of year to be about balance. It's not the time to try and "white knuckle it" on a 1200 calorie per day diet, nor is it the time to say "Christmas only comes once a year" as you dive into a giant fruitcake. Special occasions come on a regular basis, so I try to find the happy medium.

For me that means I came down and had lunch yesterday at a special restaurant mom wanted me to try. I had their homemade corned beef hash & home fries with poached eggs. I ate half and sent the rest home with my son. Then I ate baked fish & sauteed zucchini for dinner. I got up and had one of my regular breakfasts then swung a kettlebell for 30 minutes. I had sauteed fish for lunch with diced avocado and tomato on top (it was delicious!), then my afternoon snack was a cup of coffee with one of mom's homemade ginger snaps. :-)

Every meal or snack doesn't need to be a party in my mouth - not even this time of year.

Take care.

Same old, same old

I weight the same as I did at the first of the month. Given the stress and the holidays, maybe I should be satisfied with that. But I'm not.

Nothing much to say

It's been a busy week - tying up loose ends at work since folks are getting ready to go out (including me!), busy at home, blah blah blah. So glad I postponed my test. I didn't even realize how utterly stressed, burned out, and utterly exhausted I was. I am beginning to regroup and feel like I have a handle and a plan.

Weight is around the same. Eh.

Decision Made

I re-scheduled my exam. Again. Part of me is frustrated with me, but I don't feel ready, and the more stressed I get the harder it is to focus, the harder it is to study, and around and around... So I rescheduled for January 31. That gives me PLENTY of time to study and be ready. I made my decision, maybe now I can stop having stress dreams and comforting myself with food. GAH.

A good night's sleep

Last night we were falling asleep on the sofa and decided to go to bed. It was 8 PM. I woke up this morning at 7 AM. So yeah, 11 hours of sleep. Gosh, do you think maybe I was exhausted???? A good night of sleep and a good workout at the gym have me feeling a lot better. I still have a lot on my plate, but I'm feeling a lot more like myself.

A new low on the scale - 146.9. I have no idea how long it will take me to get to "goal" (whatever that may be), but I continue to head in the right direction, despite the rough week.

Take care.

Hanging on

Down another half pound this week, which is amazing since I am NOT exercising and am turning to food for stress reduction. Dude, I have to take care of myself and I'm not. This isn't good. I don't feel confident about exam prep at all. I may postpone (again) just for the sake of my sanity. Then do I create test anxiety if I keep postponing? ARGH.

Conflicted

One of the gals from my class came over and we studied today. Ugh - sometimes I feel like I am getting this stuff and sometimes I am like a deer in the headlights! It's been a very long time since I had to study for a test, let alone a 4 hour standardized computerized exam! 

Christmas cards are mostly done, mom headed back home (with ex MIL in tow), house is reasonably picked up, I have a cleaning gal coming Monday which will get me through the holidays at least.

I haven't hardly worked out this week and I MISS IT.

Still here

First, thanks! It's a volunteer position (so it's a job, just not a paid one! LOL). But still, I'm excited. At least I will be if I ever have time to think about it. :-)

Doing okay, studying, trying to stay sane. Trip to Georgia was fine. Alma is really going downhill and it's sad. But she's still healthy, so even though her mind is terrible and her quality of life is crap, her body is hanging tough. :-(

Juggling way too many things. Studying but reminding myself if I don't pass on the first try it's okay - I just study more & take it again. Not the end of the world - just a bit more money.

You guys take care!

Oh, my dining room retro tree!

Trying

In various news:

• I lost a half pound this week. I need to focus on the positive. Not a lot, but the right direction!

• I have started studying. The amount and difficulty of the material is daunting. But I've started.

• A while back I applied for a national level position of the non profit we are active in. I got it! So, I'm excited, but hope I pass this exam before training for that gets going too much.

Mom and I are headed to Georgia to see my great aunt this weekend. (Have I mentioned that?) I don't feel like I have time, but it's important, so off we go. The tree is up and has lights and beads, maybe ornaments will happen soon!

Oh, we shot a short promo video for the kettlebell class! It's like 3-4 minutes long and includes an unwanted intrusion by my dog and my spouse then coming in and grabbing her up. Keeping it real. LOL

Have a good weekend!

Doing (mostly) okay

Sorry for not blogging - just isn't a priority right now. I'm doing okay, doing what I can when I can. I lost a pound in November, but hey - I LOST a pound in November, even with Thanksgiving right at the end, so I feel like I'm holding my own on the health front.

Insane schedule

The good news is I started physical therapy on my shoulder, which is great! But that is also one more layer of complexity on an already insane schedule. Seriously, between physical therapy, T's wack work schedule, holidays, work, shopping, I feel like I am being pulled in 567 directions at once. I find myself getting overwhelmed, which stresses out my husband, which I hate because right now his work is stressful enough. ugh!

Yesterday I went to breakfast with my in-laws, hit the gym, ate with friends (Jan was going to come over but she was sick), then fixed a turkey and we had a quiet meal when T got home. It was nice, but after dinner I spent probably 30 minutes wandering around the house just putting stuff away! LOL It does look better headed into the weekend at least. Very few leftovers left other than turkey, which was the plan.

I hope you have a great weekend!

Don't get discouraged - you don't have an expiration date!

Congrats to Paula who mentioned in the comments that she's had a run of a couple of good days. Awesome! Build on that and keep going!!

There's a lot of food around this time of year that isn't normally. And if you are the sort that wants to enjoy your grandmother's cornbread dressing or those special German Christmas cookies, I'm not going to judge you! It becomes a problem if you can't moderate those foods. Then it's easy to allow the stress of the season or the availability to short circuit your brain and justify having "just one more", which is often more like "all of them."

So there is a whole mindset built up around what a minefield this time of year is. And a lot of "diet" articles reinforce that idea. Well, only if you want it to be! I try to turn the frown upside down: There are foods I am going to want to eat. Because of that I am extra vigilant with my other foods. Little cheats I might normally let slide are off the table.

Here's my food for the week:

Breakfast: a boiled egg chopped up with a little cheese and half a slice of bacon. I mush it up with a half a tablespoon of mayo and a teaspoon of mustard and toast it on a slice of sprouted grain bread. I have my usual 2 cups of coffee with 2 T each of half & half. I forgot my 2 prunes, but I will have them later. I was still hungry when I got to the office so I had 6 raw, unsalted almonds.

AM snack: 1/2 serving (17 grams?) frozen mango chunks with 1/3 c homemade full fat yogurt.

Lunch: 6 oz baked catfish, 3 small boiled new potatoes, sauteed green beans.

Afternoon snack: 3 T tandoori flavored hummus & baby carrots.

Dinner: beef stew (homemade)

PM snack if hungry: 1/2 oz cashews

I have my relatively healthy grain early in the day then taper off. I stay away from processed foods, focusing on foods I've prepared myself and vegetables. My gym schedule is posted on the white board in the kitchen and is non negotiable - not because I believe in "burning off" the indulgences, but because when I am working out I tend to eat healthier and am more focused on my health overall.

I hope you all have a great day!

Accountability

I got my food planned and prepped, with extra healthy choices mapped out for the week. I have a scaled down Thanksgiving menu planned and I am not going to let the leftovers loiter! I didn't get everything done that I wanted, but my house is picked up and I feel ready for the week.

Make it a good one!

Disappointing

When you make a big meal that involves beef & carbs for your child the night before a weigh in? Yeah, nasty scale, I'm ignoring you!

Have a good weekend. :-)

Still here

Still here. Busy week. Good news at the ortho - shoulder is aggravated rather than injured (my bursa is inflamed). I do have rehab as well as exercises, stretches, and an icing protocol, but I should be good to go to teach my kettlebell class in January!

Rescheduled

I rescheduled my PMP exam until later in December. I didn't have enough time to study and do well. I've made out a schedule and a plan, so hopefully I can find some focus and get to it!

Goals and stretch goals

Good morning and happy Friday - we made it!

Thank you for the comments and good thoughts - we all go through rough patches - at work, in relationships, it's just a normal part of life. It is hard to compartmentalize, but it's important to not let the stress from one area bleed over and negatively impact other areas of our lives - at least not too much or all the time!

After dinner we went to Planet Fitness. We were both feeling cold and tired and wanted to hibernate. I walked on the treadmill for 20 minutes. That's it - no tire flipping, no beast workout, just 20 minutes of brisk walking. At the end we both felt so much better! And we both slept better than we had in days.

There are 6 weeks left in the year. I would love to lose 6 pounds by year end, but that's not really realistic - still, that's my stretch goal. My goal is to get under 145. Since I weighed 148.0 this morning, that is a goal of losing at least 3.1 pounds - so a half pound a week. That feels doable.

I lost 1.8 pounds this week. I've been bouncing a lot, but that's some good downward progress - especially in a tough week. I've worked out 4 days and am going to the kettlebell gym in the morning, so I'm hanging in there. Maybe with tears and some snacking, but I'm not throwing in the towel by a long shot!

Have a good weekend!

Not exactly true

In my last post, I said I didn't know what's going on. Not exactly true. Work sucks and my job stress is at an 11. I need to learn to compartmentalize work and leave it at the office because it's only going to get worse until I get a new job. I need to focus on doing the things I need to do to take care of myself and my family. Stress eating and stress in general isn't helping - it's hurting. Thankfully I have that appointment with the counselor in a couple of weeks. Hopefully that will help.

A bunch of stuff, not much studying

Besides work, I've gotten a lot of things accomplished the past couple of days, sadly studying for my PMP is not among them. I can't seem to focus. Not sure what's going on.

Le sigh.

Just ugh

Work was beyond frustrating yesterday. I just ran out of the proverbial spoons. Had insomnia. At 3 AM I felt something akin to despair. It was scary because honestly I'm dealing with some stuff but nothing of that magnitude.

I am feeling better today. Still stressed and a little overwhelmed, but better. This is the article with the meals I used to make breakfasts:

https://greatist.com/eat/healthy-freezer-meals

I made the breakfast quesedillas, bagel bombs, and oat bars.

Take care of yourself.

Awesome workout

Brad at the gym has had shoulder issues and recently had surgery. I told him what the doctor thought might be my potential issue(s), and he gave me exercises that were safe as well as some great rehab type stuff. It was a terrific workout!

One challenge is that my husband is not as much of a morning person as I am. Additionally, his time table is much tighter than mine, so I am generally in charge of getting his breakfast while he takes a shower. While I am perfectly happy eating the same thing 5 days in a row, he gets bored. And I like to get out at a reasonable time as well. 

I found some prep ahead freezer safe breakfasts and picked 3. That way he has a nice selection and a good 2-3 weeks worth of breakfasts in the freezer - more if I mix in something else from time to time. Win!

I saw this in an email the other day and I thought it was perfect.

If you aren't where you want to be with something, why not start now? :-)

Have a great weekend!

Two steps forward, one and a half back

It's so frustrating how you will do so awesome for days and days, then drink a beer and poof, the scale is up a pound. Drinking lots of water and limiting carbs today.

This week has been nuts. My boss is out for the week - on an actual vacation with his wife, so naturally stuff is blowing up. LOL.

Did my mid week food prep yesterday so I have breakfasts, lunches, snacks, and dinners to get us through until the weekend plus.  So yay me! Going to the gym this evening, so I will let you know that the trainer has to say about workouts with my shoulder.

In other news, I got a haircut at lunch today.

Take care.

Too much reality!!

One of the things we came home to was a bill from the IRS. UGH!! I swear some days I feel like we will never be out of debt, let alone get ahead. Le sigh. Oh well, we will deal with it. Ugh, I say, ugh.

In other news, thanks for commenting Paula! My shoulder is feeling better! I haven't been lifting weights, but I've spoken with the trainers at the gym and they are going to help me with a plan. I have been doing cardio. My weight continues to creep down, but downward it is moving. So that is good!

I am taking my PMP exam on December the 9th and I need to buckle down and study. I am dreading both the studying and the taking of the exam.

Here is a lovely shot of today's breakfast. Clearly I should be a food stylist. LOL

Yogurt with some raw oats, raspberries, chia seeds, and a sprinkle of granola. I should have added some nuts but I forgot. Oh well. It was yummy!

Take care.

Back to reality

I am back from a lovely vacation with my husband. We went to the mountains! We went to the beach! We had alone time, time with family, cooked in, ate out, went to an SCA event and ended it all with the Jewish festival. Even though we did a lot, it still managed to feel largely relaxing.

Win.

argh

Well, I am on vacation. I saw my doctor. No bone chips, but I can't get in to see the physio until November 19th, so I am pretty freaking demoralized about that. :-(

Rocking it like an octogenarian

So last week I was carrying the recycling out and I tripped and fell. I landed on my hip, but put my left arm out (the one not carrying the recycling tub) to help catch me. I was a little sore, but no biggie, right? Except my left shoulder never got better, and has actually gotten worse. So today I broke down and went to the doctor. For x rays and a referral to a physio later, I still don't have any answers, just some good cream and the knowledge that we are working toward getting answers. The x rays are to rule out the possibility of any bone chips. She thinks its probably a torn labrum muscle or tendonitis of the rotator cuff. Who knew you could get tendonitis from a sharp impact? So I will find out. In the meantime, take it easy on the arm and no upper body lifting. UGH.

My Venezia jeans

I wore my size 14 ancient Venezia jeans yesterday and they were very loose. Those jeans are ancient - from the days before they added spandex to jeans, so they have zero stretch. So maybe I'm getting smaller even though I'm not really losing much weight? I dunno.

Here is my weight chart for the last few months:

06/21/19	151.7	-1.7
06/28/19	152.4	0.7
07/05/19	152.5	0.1
07/12/19	151.6	-0.9
07/19/19	149.6	-2.0
07/26/19	151.5	1.9
08/02/19
08/09/19	154.1	2.6
08/16/19	155.2	1.1
08/23/19	153.6	-1.6
08/30/19	153.5	-0.1
09/06/19	153.4	-0.1
09/13/19	151.3	-2.1
09/20/19	152.0	0.7
09/27/19	149.4	-2.6
10/04/19	150.9	1.5
10/11/19	151.0	0.1
10/18/19	150.4	-0.6
10/25/19	149.4	-1.0

So basically 4 months to lose 2 pounds. When I look at it that way, I get really demoralized! Then I think of the stuff that has gone on and the fact that I have maintained my loss - that's pretty good! There are 9 weeks left in the year - I won't get to goal. OTOH, there isn't a finish line, this is my life and I just need to keep making forward progress - including learning how to deal with stress in healthier ways to successfully maintain the weight I have lost.

I'm just feeling 2 minds of the whole thing I guess.

I need to fire my cleaning gal and I hate it but there is also that. :-(  She's the daughter of a friend but it just isn't working out and instead of being a help it's become still yet even another source of stress in my life and frankly I have enough of those without voluntarily taking more on. T says he will do it but realistically he won't so I need to find someone else. Ugh.

Tomorrow I am going to the gym and then just doing stuff around the house. Sunday I am helping make lunch at church - I haven't done that since we re-opened so I am excited about that. Volunteering brings me joy.

Have a good weekend!

I think we skipped fall

I fell like we've moved directly to winter. It was 39 this morning. Thank goodness for fleece pajamas. In other news, T and I have vacation next week - fun is soon to be afoot! :-)

Tonight is kettlebells.

Take care.

Wednesday already???

This week has been pretty busy, but not too bad. Monday I was in the office and went to Anytime Fitness and used the elliptical. Last night I went to Master's and did kettlebells.

It didn't take too long, but it was intense and I used heavier than usual weights, so I felt like I got a good workout. I sent what I had put together for the challenge to Elle, so we'll see what she says. Anyway, I am having fun working on it! I will keep you guys posted.

That's about all I know - just the usual stuff.

Take care.

Oh my gosh!

So I went to the gym yesterday and worked out (which is kinda the point of going to the gym). I spoke with Elle. We are developing a 6 week long class/ challenge that will kick off in January based on the concept of high volume kettlebell swinging. I will come up with each week's workout. Each week we will make a video of me doing the workout and we will do it in the gym as a group 3 times with me helping facilitate.

I am going to be helping teach kettlebells in a real gym y'all!!

Feeling Stuck (again)

This:

07/05/19	152.5	0.1
07/12/19	151.6	-0.9
07/19/19	149.6	-2.0
07/26/19	151.5	1.9
08/02/19
08/09/19	154.1	2.6
08/16/19	155.2	1.1
08/23/19	153.6	-1.6
08/30/19	153.5	-0.1
09/06/19	153.4	-0.1
09/13/19	151.3	-2.1
09/20/19	152.0	0.7
09/27/19	149.4	-2.6
10/04/19	150.9	1.5
10/11/19	151.0	0.1
10/18/19	150.4	-0.6

The 2.6 gained mid August was vacation. The 1.5 early October was prednisone. But still, the reality is I've been hovering around 150 FOREVER. It's time to get it over with already! I need to move to 145. No days off, no cheats, no bullshit excuses until then. Period.

Have a good weekend.

Big accomplishment

When I packed up my house in 2011 to move to Florida, I donated a lot of clothes that didn't fit. I also packed up a bunch in tubs where they have remained. Until today. Today I unpacked the last tub. There are 4 pair of jeans and 1 shirt I think are too small, and 2 shirts I'm not sure I like the fit. Those are all in a single dresser drawer waiting a decision whether I hang onto them or they get donated. But there are no more clothes in tubs waiting for the day I finally lose weight.

Whoops

I didn't mean to drop off the planet - just been busy and focused on other things and hadn't blogged, but everything is fine.

I finished my last class on Saturday, so now I just have to finish my certification package and schedule the exam. My son and his friend are coming up this weekend to help with a few projects around the house - yay! I am looking forward to having a weekend to work on some stuff around here and not think about that work type stuff. :-)

One thing I have managed to do is pull out my fall/ winter clothes:

Saturday I went a bought a couple pair of slacks, so I think I'm okay on the pants front. I could use a pair of navy, but they aren't necessary. I knew I had a lot of tops, I just wasn't sure what fit. So I pulled it all out and tried everything on.  Good times. I have a large pile of stuff to donate - it either doesn't fit or I don't like it. I have enough. Not saying I might not look at tops here and there when I got thrift shopping with mom, but I don't *need* anything. So that's nice. We are moving from our satellite office back to the main office, so I will have to start wearing business casual every day. Sigh.

I am getting together with Elle Saturday after the regular workout to discuss my class she wants me to teach. I will keep you guys posted. I may be making a video!!! If they post it on the facebook page I will let you know.

Have a good day!

Workout

I haven't done as much with the fitness challenge as I would have liked, but last night I finally made it to CrossFit. I did it! Tonight I am going back to the kbell gym, but it was fun to do something different with different people and get out of my comfort zone.

My weight is still a bit up, but I took my last antibiotic and prednisone last night. Hopefully we can turn this bus around.

Overall, feeling better.

Take care.

Things I am doing to take care of myself

The good news is it looks like my boss will be staying through the end of the year! Yay! The (lack of) transition had me worried as this is our busiest time of year. I am still sad and have some concerns, but I feel less stressed about it. He is the best boss I've ever had and I love our team. I have some concerns about how things will be moving forward. I'm working dealing with that uncertainty & stress.

I've watched my eating in spite of being sick and the family stress, and I am thankful of that. Eating won't solve anything, it will just help me ignore it for a little while.

Lastly T and I have been struggling with some issues and after some tough but heartfelt conversations we are taking steps (together and individually) to address them. We deserve to do better for each other, and we are committed to working on it. His mom is home, he seems to be settling in to his job, and we can identify and work on these things now before they become bigger, tougher issues.

I went to the gym last night. As you guys know, I love going to the gym, but before I ever joined I was swinging a kettlebell on my own. I began reading a blog over a decade ago and loved what the author was doing. I read her routines, taught myself by watching videos, copied her routines, made my own routines, and embraced her philosophy. Fast forward and she is now a trainer & author (Tracy Reifkind).

Last night I told Elle how if it hadn't been for having a kettlebell under my desk, these last couple of weeks would have been tough and how awesome it is that I know how with 1 bell, a tiny bit of space, and 20 minutes I can craft a great workout for myself and I wished I could share that. So we are going to do a class at the gym! Can you believe it!? I am going to help develop/ teach a class at a gym!?!? Shut the front door!!! How neat is that?????

Anyway, I am definitely having my ups and downs - on the scale and in my mind, but I'm doing okay.

Take care of yourself.

Carrying on

Two more days of the steroids. My weight is up a pound, but not going any higher. I am not 100%, but am feeling better. I'm tired and am feeling pretty overwhelmed, but I'm doing the best I can right now.

Pseudo gumbo (cooking edition)

Yeah, pretty much. :-)

I was able to get food prep done yesterday, even though I wasn't really feeling it. Since I generally feel like eating, I cook whether I "feel" like it or not! LOL

Menu for this week:

breakfast: overnight oats or "deviled" egg salad toasted on a slice of sprouted grain bread
snack: hummus & veggies
lunch: seafood gumbo & a salad
snack: fruit & plain Greek yogurt

Dinners vary.

The gumbo came out really tasty - I didn't have a recipe and didn't find one I really liked, so I ended up winging it. My husband told me he could sell the heck out of it in a restaurant, so that made me feel good! He came home hungry, so I gave him a cup as an appetizer.

Pseudo gumbo

Saute the trinity (bell pepper, onion, and celery). I used a little olive oil and then sweated it down with a couple tablespoons of white wine. I also added a couple of cloves of garlic. I set that aside. Then I made a roux with ghee and a couple tablespoons of flour. This is where I went off course - I didn't have anything to make fish stock so I used Japanese dashi powder. (Hey, its powdered fish stock!). Cooked my okra and a can of tomatoes in it, added Cajun seasoning blend plus hot sauce and Worcestershire. Once I had seasonings adjusted just to the spicy side I added my shrimp and fish and let them cook in the hot liquid until just done. easy peasy! I'll probably be tired of it by Friday but I was pleased with the result.

Deviled egg salad - This is super easy and I make it "on demand"

1 boiled egg
1/4 avocado
a little bit of shredded cheddar (depends on your calories)
bacon bits (use the real deal)
S&P (I like season salt here)
a squirt of mustard
Just enough mayo to help it hang together (less than a tablespoon)

Mush it all together, put it on bread and toast until cheese is melty. Really good, different, quick, and you can easily adjust your calories and macros.

Ok, have a good day!

Trying to be okay

Ugh, you guys.

My weight is up 1.5 pounds this week. Considering that 1) I am taking prednisone and 2) last night was our eating out night for the week, I am not surprised. But it's still hard to see. Hopefully it will come back off quickly when this is over. In the meantime, I am trying to accept water weight and stay the course with my diet via meal planning.

MIL continues to improve and is ahead of schedule with occupational and physical therapy, so that is good. She will not be able to be left alone for a while, so that will have to get figured out. I am hanging on by my finger nails.

Class 4 of 5 tomorrow. I can't wait for this to be done.

Have a good weekend.

Is this week over yet

My nose is like an old drippy faucet - not gushing, but running just enough to be super annoying. Ugh.

Crazy

I tell ya, the hits just keep coming. Friday I called and got an appointment with my doctor - and I'm glad I did. She told me my ear drum was bulging from the pressure of the yuck. I went to class this weekend - still feeling not good but doing what needed to be done. Sunday I did the grocery shopping, then I took a short nap & had some lunch. My plan was to do food prep after that. T called - my MIL had a stroke and he was on the way home. He came home & had a bite to eat, then we headed to the hospital.

She was doing pretty well, took a turn for the worse Monday, and then woke up yesterday doing better again. So obviously there's a lot that is going to change for my in-laws and my husband is very concerned.

My doctor gave me an antibiotic and prednisone (to dry up the copious drainage).  I am feeling better but I still coughed myself awake a lot the past 2 nights. Last night I skipped the kettlebell gym so we could go to the hospital - I did go a quick workout at lunch with the bell under my desk. This morning I went to spin class.  Food has been on point and I am doing what I can to get rest and manage stress, but it's not easy just now - which means now is when I need it most.

Take care.

Sinus infection

I went to the doctor today. As I suspected, sinus infection. Bonus ear infection. Yuck. No wonder I feel like poop.

Sleep

I skipped spin class Wednesday and I don't feel guilty! It's been a tough week and I don't feel good. I emailed my doctor - I'm wondering whether I have a sinus infection. I don't feel like I have a cold but none of the OTC remedies I have tried have touched the runny nose & cough I have had for 2 weeks now. So I don't think it's just allergies either.

I slept until 4:30 Wednesday and Thursday, and 5 this morning. I was up for about an hour in the middle of the night Thursday, but honestly that's still an improvement. Workouts have been light and I've focused on rest. It sucks this has been in the middle of my month to try all these new gyms for free, but I certainly don't want to make myself sicker by wearing myself down.

I was down 2.6 pounds this week, after being up 0.7 last week, so that feels good! I have my all day class again tomorrow but I'm hoping to squeeze in a quick walk with the dogs before I head out.

Have a good weekend!

A little better

This morning I managed to sleep until 4:30. It used to be I'd wake up at 2 or so, be awake for an hour, then go back to bed. Now when I wake up it's too late to go back to bed so I end up just staying up, which is leaving me exhausted. I need some sleep! T is off Thursday, I have to come in but I don't need to set the alarm until 5:30. I am working from home tomorrow but I signed up for spin class, so I will get up early, but then go to the dentist then head back home. I can have my breakfast ready to go and my clothes laid out so I can roll out of bed, grab my stuff, & head out pretty quickly. Alarm set for 4:45 I'm thinking. God, if only I can sleep until then!

I think my weight isn't moving because I'm not rested.

Just sad

Not gonna lie, this weekend was just sad. My son is just heart broken, and I am just so sad for everyone. And being in class all day on Saturday leaves me very little time to do the things I need to get done, so I am tired. And my insomnia was tough last week - so sad, sleep deprived, too much to do. Yeah. Not the best for sure.

We did take the dogs to the park to walk around the lake for a bit which was really nice. F and his gf went with us and then left from there to head back to Wilmington. I made some pumpkin spice yogurt - I like it this time of year but some brands are better than others so I tried my hand at making my own. I had a can of pumpkin so I mixed some pumpkin, plain yogurt, pumpkin pie spices, and sweetener together. I should have added a little vanilla - I forgot. Anyway, it came out pretty good! And it's cheaper and healthier than pre made.

Not too much else to report. I'm sticking to making (mostly) healthy eating choices because eating garbage won't change anything but my pants size.

Friday

Plan for next week:

Monday - CrossFit
Tuesday - Kettlebell gym
Wednesday - boy band smackdown at CycleBar
Thursday - Kettlebell gym
Friday - yoga to help recover from the week

My son and his gf are coming up tomorrow for the funeral.

Take care.

This week

I went to spin class Monday morning at Cycle Bar. I really enjoyed it.

My son's best friend from high school was killed in a car accident Monday when a car crossed the double line and hit his head on. They don't know what happened, but does it even matter? They were still really close - he was over at the house 2 or 3 weeks ago to pick up a propeller. We don't know what the arrangements are yet. I think we're just in shock. My son has never lost anyone his age and I know it's hard. So that sucks.

I dunno. It's a week, you know? Going to work, working out, eating food, had a meeting at church about re-opening the lunch program. Just life. It goes on for the living.

Thought

As I was packing my lunch to take with me to class on Saturday (and feeling weird about it), I had this thought: Those who know me don't care, those who don't know me don't matter. It's hard to feel that way, but it's true! I need to do what's right for me and not worry about what strangers might think! (And I wasn't the only person to pack lunch!).

Class was boring, but not as bad as it could have been. The instructor was really good. The good/bad thing is that we have a different instructor each Saturday. One Saturday down, 4 to go.

Happy Friday!

We made it to the weekend! The week started off rough but it's ended much better. I had a good workout last night. I went to the orientation for the Wellness Challenge and I am fired up and ready to go. I am NOT excited about my project management class, but I am accepting of my fate (LOL).

Plan for tomorrow is to get up & walk dogs, eat breakfast & pack lunch, then head for class. Come home & change and T and I are meeting friends for dinner at a restaurant in Old Salem Old Salem is a historic district/ living history museum. George Washington ate at the tavern, which features food inspired by the meals served there in the 1700s. My husband has never been and he's really excited! So it should be a nice evening.

Sunday will be busy with shopping and food prep. I also plan to watch the final "Halloweentown" movie since the spousal unit won't be home. (Don't judge me!).

I lost 2.1 pounds this week, bringing me to 151.3. I am thrilled to be headed in the right direction at more than a snail's pace again. Oh, and I did a PULL UP at the gym last night. So I am a BEAST. In case you didn't know.

Make your weekend awesome!

Gearing Up

Tonight is the Wellness Challenge orientation at 6:30. It's going to be at a CrossFit gym 10 minutes from my kettlebell gym. Since my workout is typically 5:30 to 6:30 I will need to leave 15 minutes early to get there on time-ish. I already let Ellie know. Tonight's dinner is meat loaf, mashed cauliflower, and salad. I tossed half a serving of meatloaf into my lunchbox knowing it could be 8 PM before I got home this evening (I left the house at 6:15 this morning). When I think about what my schedule is going to look like on the weekends I want to cry, but then I just decide to take it one day at a time and focus on the fact that I am going to get to try some new & fun stuff.

I will let you know how it goes!

Oh, our cleaning gal starts today! I am SO excited!!!!!

We plan and god laughs

The best laid plans....

Monday morning at 4:30 some jerk (either drunk or high I'm sure) smashed into a telephone pole hard enough to break it in half and then drove off 2 houses over. Our power was out for 13+ hours and we lost the contents of both refrigerators and the inside freezer. All my food prep went into the garbage. So my week didn't get off to the best start.

Oh well. We went out for dinner, I made a good choice. We picked up a few things to get us through the next day and I'm working at home today so I can pick up a few more things. We have a food spoilage rider on our home owners insurance. It's an inconvenience and I wasted some time, but I can replace the food.

I've been in a funk. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's this class I have coming up? It's one of those things I file under "necessary but not pleasant". It will help with career and salary advancement (I hope!), but I don't like giving up my weekend time. Maybe I'm looking for a goal - something to focus on besides weight and doing a pull up. Things are basically okay, but there isn't anything I'm especially excited about right now. I guess that's why I signed up for this fitness challenge even though the timing is terrible - I just want something different and new to try.

Take care of yourself!

Falling into fall

I'm not typically a fall person, I'm more an unrepentant summer person. But I bought pumpkin spice yogurt, put up fall decor, and watched "Halloweentown" yesterday. Who am I???

Meal plan for the week (assuming my power is restored). It was knocked out this morning when someone smashed into a power pole.If all my food prep is for nothing because all my food in the fridge goes over if the power is out for hours I will be highly irate!

Breakfast:
egg salad on sprouted grain toast

Snack 1:
greek yogurt

Lunch:
oven fried catfish, vegan collard greens, lightened up squash casserole

Snack 2:
surprise dip with veggies

Dinner varies. Tonight and tomorrow are seared ahi tuna with a thai seasoned brown rice & quinoa blend and asian slaw

Even as I am lamenting my lack of time I up and signed up for the Winston Salem wellness challenge Maybe I just needed something to be excited about.

Have a good day!

More questions than answers

This post isn't really about weight loss, so feel free to skim. :-)

My class starts next Saturday for my project management certification course. It's 5 Saturdays in a row, all day. Getting my certification is going to be a significant amount of work, and I can't say I am looking forward to it. The purpose is to give my boss leverage to justify giving me a nice raise because honestly I am seriously underpaid.

My cleaning gal starts this week - I really hope it works out. I have been feeling so overwhelmed and frankly a bit resentful because I've been feeling my husband could do more. Partly he's been working hard at work, partly it's because he's not in the physical shape to handle his job as well as he could. Partly it's that I'm a control freak and like some things done a certain way.

I'd like to spend more time to seeing my friends and doing things I enjoy, but my friends are busy too and I'm not even sure what I enjoy. My crafting mojo seems to have left the building. I dunno. Am I depressed? Overwhelmed? Being a baby? I wish I knew. I just know I don't feel very satisfied with things right now, but I'm not quite sure what to do about it.

Three week streak!

First of all, I have lost weight 3 weeks in a row. The past 2 weeks that has been 0.1 pounds - lol. I did speak with my FNP Wednesday and she gave me a couple of suggestions/ recommendations as well as reminding me that the last 10 pounds are the toughest. So I have a game plan.

This week has been incredibly tough. Mom made what I am calling her second annual hurricane evacuation vacation to my house. Which is nice, but a change from routine. T has jacked up his knee so I am doing his chores as well as my own while we figure out what is going on and what that will mean. My son and his gf opted to stay on Carolina Beach for the hurricane for several reasons. And while I agreed that it was the logical decision given the downgraded status of the storm, that doesn't mean this momma wasn't worried.

I'd say I'm glad for the weekend but I'm afraid it's a case of no rest for the wicked. Ha ha. Too much to do. I am going to try and pace myself, do what needs to be done, and include some fun things.

Take care.

Boringsville

Happy Hump day! The vestry meeting went okay - we are planning to reopen the lunch program in October. So we have work to do between then and now. Starting my PMP in a couple of weeks is just going to add a layer of busy, so I need to nail down the cleaning lady (starting next week) and meal planning. I won't be able to go to the gym on Saturday since my class is all day, so going 2 evenings per week will be imperative.

I found a really good evening snack!! Vintage Surprise Dip is really yummy and the addition of green beans means the calorie count for a reasonable portion isn't crazy. I added some dried minced onion for a nice extra punch, but its a solid dip as is. I paired it with a (weighed out) serving of pork rinds for a satisfying and low carb evening snack. It's a keeper!

Have a good day!

Food prep

Howdy, howdy, welcome back from a long holiday weekend. I did my best imitation of a house elf and did a bunch of stuff around the house & yard, so that's good! I overdid it a couple of times, but overall it was a restful AND productive weekend!

When T was teaching, he got home early and was done for the day. We pretty much alternated cooking duties and took leftovers for our lunches. That model is no longer working. He comes home more tired, and doesn't take a lunch since he works in a restaurant.

For lunches I've flipped back to an earlier model where I prep 4 lunches for the week, doing something different on the 5th day. These days that's my "at home" day, but I used to indulge in the food truck or going out once a week. With no need for the leftovers, I am planning 4 servings but we eat the meal twice in a row. So it looks something like this:

Mon & Tue: meal 1
Wed: meal 2
Thur & Fri meal 3
Sat: out maybe
Sun: ?

We generally eat out once a week. This model lets me prep on Sunday (the day I'm doing food rep anyway) for Mon & Tues, then Wednesday I generally work at home so I'll prep for Thu & Fri. I'm not really cooking when I get home (since I get home so late), but T doesn't have a lot he has to do either. That frees him up to relax, work on the house and/or yard, etc. Since we're only eating the same meal twice, and only doing that twice, we still feel like we're getting a good variety and I don't feel like I'm overwhelmed with planning, shopping, and prep for a bunch of different meals.It works for us because we both like leftovers and we both have input into the meals we eat. That way we are both getting our favorites into regular rotation.

This week's meals:
Breakfast: turkey burger on a slice of ezekiel bread
Snack: 12 almonds & a clementine
Lunch: spicy salmon bowl
Snack: string cheese or almonds & clementine
Dinner - varies as above.

My mom came in from Wilmington today to wait out the storm, so we'll need ot change up dinner plans a bit.

I went to the kbell gym Saturday and yesterday. That worked well since I typically go Tuesday night but can't tonight due to a vestry meeting on re-opening the lunch program.

I hope you had a good weekend. Take care!

Same same

Well my weight is the same as last Friday (well, down 0.1 pounds lol). Okay. This has felt a bit like turning an aircraft carrier in terms of getting my good habits back, but I am getting there. I went to the kettlebell gym again last night and did a great workout. I have a solid plan for getting food prep manageable and I am interviewing another potential cleaning lady Monday.

Have a great long weekend!

It's been a week

Work has been busy, life has been crazy. having said that, I'm back at the kettlebell gym and food is largely on track. I've just been too busy - or too cranky! - to post.

But I'm still here, and doing ok despite this week's best efforts.

Logging it

Good morning.

I am taking tomorrow off and we are headed to the beach as soon as T gets home from work. Yay!! Since I won't be here tomorrow, I logged this morning's weigh in for the week. 153.6 - down 1.6 pounds from last Friday. I won't make my goal of being back under 150 by the end of the month, but God laughs when we set deadlines. I am headed in the right direction, feeling much better, and am okay with where I am.

Take care.

A work in progress

It's scary how easy it is to return to old habits. I've been dealing with some major stressors - one is a work issue (mostly resolved I think) and the other is a crappy insurance/ incorrectly submitted medical bill issue. I left work yesterday VERY upset. I called T and asked if he wanted anything from the grocery on the way home. So I stopped and got a soda and 2 boxes of TGIF appetizers. After dinner I made a couple of each for each of us. Then he had to go back into work and I finished both boxes. It was scary.

This morning I woke up at 3:33 very shaken. I asked myself what I could do to "take back my power." I made the medical billing thing my top priority this morning. I sent what additional info I had to the patient advocate gal I'm working with. (What does it say about our system that companies hire other companies to deal with medical claim issues for their employees to salvage productive work time?). I then got every bill I've paid so far this year and sent them over to our reimbursement group. It's like an FSA, but the company will pay after you've spent $500 out of pocket (up to $2000). I submitted $528 for the year so far, so if I do get hit with this, at least I will be able to get reimbursed.

Still frustrating, but at least I know I won't get slapped with a big medical bill out of the blue. Or if I do I can be reimbursed for it.

I am trying hard to reclaim my peace and focus.I sent a note to Ellie at the gym saying I would see her Tuesday. No, I haven't been to the kettlebell gym since we got back. I have been using my kettlebell at home and going to Anytime Fitness though. But I need that extra bit to push me, so I set myself up to be accountable to someone for going next week.

Have a good day!

Turning the aircraft carrier

For whatever reason, getting back into the groove has been so hard. I am trying to be patient with myself, making consistent, positive baby steps back to where I was. It's not a race, every improvement is improvement, and it's okay.

I need that on a repeat loop in my brain until it all gets back into place.  I am frustrated with myself, and trying hard not to be. Boy, isn't that a fun cycle to be in!

I control my choices

I have several stressors right now. T and I are having work stress, and I am struggling to get back into my ore holiday groove. This weekend I told myself I just needed to do a 15 minute kettlebell workout, which I did. I felt better! Food wasn't totally on point, but its getting there. I did another 15 minute workout this morning. the dog was upset I was closed off in the guest room and peed on the floor to show her consternation. UGH!  Oh well, I cleaned it up and moved on. I am heading to the gym in a few minutes for my lunch break.

Breakfast this week is baked corn tortillas with refried beans, and egg, and a little chorizo for flavor.
Lunches are baked catfish, 14/ small potato and cold veggie salad.
Snacks are boiled egg and a string cheese.
Dinners vary.

Have a good week.

Time to get out of the river

Happy Friday. The title refers to the river of "denial" of course - lol. Seriously though, I popped up 1.5 before I left, then had a crazy week once back, then had to go on a business trip. I got on the scale today to a total of 5.6 pound gain - I'm sitting at 155.2.

So yeah, ugh - and it's funny, but I can feel even that little bit in my clothes. Workouts haven't been great this week, but food has been dialed back down and I am back at the gym. Not sure if I'll get below 150 in 2 weeks, but I will do my best!

Have a good weekend - here's to not going anywhere! Yay!

Weekend Recap, and ... What's next

As my mom wrote my cousin "We didn't slap anyone!" Yeah, people who haven't bothered to see Alma in a decade or more (I'm talking grandkids, not distant kin) came out of the woodwork to see each other and enjoy a free feed. Ugh. We made an appearance and left. I enjoyed the pool at the hotel - highlight of the trip.

Got on the scale this morning - up a pound from Friday. No bueno. Time to find my routine.

I've been thinking about what I want to accomplish (fitness wise) the rest of the year. Here's what I'm thinking.

Goals:

Get back to where I was on the scale (by end of August)
Under 140 (end of year)
Under 20% body fat (end of year?)
Pull up ???
Begin training squat and bench press (begin before end of year)

Not sure how it will develop - I haven't even gotten back to the gym yet. T's work schedule is insane. I'm doing everything at the house and that includes cutting the grass. I'm exhausted. But this is just temporary.

Take care.

Tough week

This has been a tough week. T's work schedule has been insane, my work has been stressful. Mom and I are driving to Georgia tomorrow, returning Sunday. I've been handling everything at home because T simply hasn't had any time at home to help out. Not his fault, just the reality this week.

I haven't managed the stress as well as I could have, but it is what it is. I gained 2.6 pounds while on vacation. Totally not a bit deal at all, I just really want to get back into my routine. Next week promises to be crazy. Working at home Monday, then to Atlanta a couple of days for a business trip. I'm trying to be smart and set us up for success.

Tonight's dinner is prepped and ready to pop into the oven when I get home. There are a couple of meals of leftovers for T while I am gone. I've hired our pet sitter to come feed critters since his work schedule is so bananas - so that's off his plate.

I'm hiring a cleaning person to do a deep clean Monday - that will help me feel better about the house. I'm planning an easy dinner Monday with plenty of leftovers for Tuesday. We'll go out Wednesday, T will cook Thursday, and I have an easy meal planned for next Friday. Then I will have a glorious weekend at home!

Take care.

I'm back

We are home safe, back at work. We have not unpacked - we dumped everything out of the car and onto the back porch! LOL This week is as hectic as can be, but I'm trying to get back into a routine. Anyway, busy day but I wanted you to know that we made it home safely after a nice trip!

Take care.

When the going gets tough

Mom had to put her dog Lulu down yesterday. It was hard. I've had a tough couple of days and I won't lie, I have done a bit of emotional eating. I also did a bit of beating myself up about it (like that ever helps!).

This morning I weighed myself (scale was up 2 pounds) and moved on. I fixed breakfast, packed lunch and snacks, put meat for dinner in the crock pot. I'm going to the gym at lunch (I did HIIT yesterday, I'll do 2.5 miles on the elliptical at lunch today), then I'll go to the kettlebell gym after work. Then I'll go home and have a yummy dinner (Korean beef bowl with plenty of veggies and a mix of rice & cauli rice), and chill on the couch with my husband for a bit.

I'm okay, this happens, it's what comes next that matters. And whether I'm this side of the 150 mark or the other when I get up Friday morning, no one but me is going to know, because no one else would notice 1-2 pounds.

Take care of yourself today.

Today was the day

TGIF and hurray for autopilot y'all. I lost 2 pounds this week, and I now weight 149.6 - my lowest weight since before I started tracking in October of 2001.

I'm getting close!

My initial goal is 140 - and I will go from there.

Have a great weekend!!!

I leave you with this: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2QiasaYdr0&feature=youtu.be&fbclid=IwAR2rD8xC81_KaHJkOZpYnS4qBfUIWkmz4c66vHRIhu15waibsG8XYV3o30Q

Still trucking along

Good morning!

Life and work have been bananas this week and I haven't had time to sit down and write. It's been nuts. Fine, just too much to do.

To answer a question in the comments: Sparkpeople has a weekly summary chart on the page:

You can tell I hadn't started yet. It fills in raw numbers, but it's pretty easy to back into the percentages with all the numbers neatly in one place.

Having explained all that, my plans to meticulously track this week have been completely derailed. Tuesday I had to work off a loaner laptop and ... blah blah excuse excuse. But since I had planned up front and had done some basic prep Sunday (including making a list of what needed to be prepped each evening), my food plan has been on auto pilot.

Also, I fly out a week from tomorrow for our annual medieval camping in Pennsylvania trip and I haven't even started to pack. Y'all, I need a break!!

Take care.

You do you

BTW, T made it home safely last night. I slept like I had been given a sleeping pill. It was great.

One of the cool side benefits of getting older is that you care less about what other people think. Last night I (for the second time in my life) rocked a sports bra style workout top at the gym. Sure my midsection still has fluff (no 6 pack here!) and my belly (which was mostly covered by shorts) has stretch marks from pregnancy, but my back is really starting to look good and wearing it made me feel strong. And a tad weird.

Doing things my own way has spilled over into other aspects of my life, including nutrition. This week I have meticulously weighed and measured so I could know what (and how much) food I was putting in my body, and how I felt as a result. This is an idea that had been rolling around in my head, but was reinforced by a podcast I listened to.

Are you a podcast person? I'm not but my husband is and Ben Greenfield is a long time favorite. An episode on optimal diet we listened to recently (okay, my husband made me listen to in his car! lol) really resonated with me. Ben's premise (backed by research) is that for all that we are alike, the spectrum of differences is greater than we think. Our ancestors adapted to different diets in different parts of the world, meaning that we are better adapted to eating a certain way. We're pretty amazing and can run on most anything for fuel, but we work better on some.

As I get closer to my goal, I am trying to hone in on what foods fuel performance and good health as well as help me lose the last of the weight. I picked a fairly standard starting point:

Macros Based on The Zone (1)	% Of Total
30% Protein	30%
40% Carbohydrate	40%
30% Fat	30%

I pretty consistently went under on the carbs and over on the protein. I felt pretty good, but my overall calorie consumption was on the low side and I felt hungry some.

Yesterday:

I am going to change the targets for the upcoming week and see how that goes. I'll work on that this weekend and let you know what I come up with. 

If you are curious, here's everything I ate yesterday (pretty typical):

The result: I'm at 151.6 pounds this morning - "only" down 0.9 pounds from last week, but a new low! So yay!

Have an awesome weekend!

Interesting

So far this little experiment has been interesting. Yesterday I worked at home so I could be more flexible with my snacks. I had a cup of coffee with 2 prunes and peanut butter in the afternoon. Two prunes have 11 grams of carbs. So 2 little prunes make a difference in my bottom line carb consumption, but I don't feel like they are "bad."

I picked the ratios I did simply because they were a place to start. If I use my actual consumption, I think that carb number would be lower than the initial target, and I will adjust accordingly since so far I feel pretty good - not overly hungry and pretty steady energy levels. I may also up my lean protein portions at mealtimes - I started with 4 oz. but I'm having to use protein shakes to get that number higher.

Very little movement on the scale, but I feel good and I plan to keep going!

Have a good day.

Better

So here's yesterday:

Better across the board, still low on calories. I wasn't hungry though. That was the difference between 1) eating a more typical meal v. store bought veggie lasagna and 2) rye wasa & hummus for 2 snacks v. boiled egg.

While I say I wasn't hungry, I was also feeling a bit anxious. Could be some stress going on right now, could be T being out of town, could be tracking my food so closely. I keep reminding myself it's an experiment and I can change it up as needed.

Lots of stressful stuff right now - drama in my hobby (ugh!), mom's dog not doing well, ex MIL going in for a heart catheritization (I have no idea how to spell that word). Is it Friday yet? Oh, and totally not packed for vacation!

Take care and I'll try to do the same, okay?

Day 1, and bra confession

When I was overweight, I wore cheap sports bras all the time. This kind:

I probably have a billion with the elastic worn out (and I've tossed a billion more!). I wore them ALL THE TIME. To "work out" (which wasn't very strenuous), to work, where ever I was going and whatever I was wearing. Yes, it totally gave me a uniboob and no it wasn't flattering. It was comfortable and I didn't care. And at roughly $3 a bra.... whatever, right?

Only sometime along the way I started to care. So I dug through my old clothes and found a couple of bras that worked until I lost more weight. The ones I have that are the correct size are either no longer comfortable or worn out.

The 2 I bought at Kohl's are Warner brand, underwire, with enough "padding" that nipples won't show through at work, but not overly padded or push up. (Why do you need that much padding in a C cup anyway?). For workouts I am using some of the same cheap sports bras, only racerback. I do have a couple of more heavy duty ones, but since I walk, use the elliptical, or lift weights as my primary forms of exercise, there isn't much in the way of high impact exercise going on so they work fine so far. But yeah, a good bra is so worth it.

Here is where I ended up at the end of the day yesterday:

I wasn't particularly hungry, but I left a lot (especially protein) on the table. Let's see how today goes!

Take care.

Good weekend

Good morning and happy Monday! LOL

I hope you had a nice weekend, whatever you did. We went to the beach and had an awesome time! I was down to one non sports bra that fit, so I ponied up and bought a couple of new ones at Kohl's. $60 for 2 bras - yikes! But they fit well and are a good brand and they should last, plus they should fit for the rest of my weight loss unless I lose a bunch (more) in the cup. And I picked up a couple of tops for work at the thrift shop that I didn't need but I like.

It was good to go, and it's good to be home. Did okay with food - scale was up 0.2 pounds this morning - so flat for the weekend. i did a bunch of food prep and so now the work begins.

T headed out for Atlanta this morning for his training class. It's going to be weird to be by myself all week!

For breakfast I made a (sort of) chicken and rice casserole - 4 oz. chicken, 1/2 c rice, 1/2 steamed broccoli, sauteed onion, bell pepper, and celery. It's tasty but a bit on the dry side. Lunch is a portion of Aldi vegetable lasagna and a salad (left over from last night). Dinner is from Food cart style chicken salad (so yummy!), and snacks are 2 T hummus with a wasa cracker (snack at 10 and then this afternoon). I added a boiled egg onto the afternoon snack to help balance macros.

I've entered what I know and I am low on protein for sure, I will need to make a protein shake for dessert this evening.

So we'll see how my little experiment goes. Here's what I set as an initial target:

Total Calories/Day	1,500
Macros Based on The Zone (1)	% Of Total	Grams/Day
30% Protein	30%	113
40% Carbohydrate	40%	150
30% Fat	30%	50

Have a good day!

Time to walk the talk

Y'all, I am now stuck at 152-ish. I've been (slightly) up the past 2 weeks. It's not that my eating is bad or out of control, it's just enough that I'm not seeing results. The closer you get to goal, the harder it is to lose. Easy to write, but a tough reality to live! Lol

I really, really, really want to see 149.9 before I leave to vacation 3 weeks from today. Two weeks ago I was at 151.7 - this morning I was 152.5. UGH!!!!! I want it so bad I can taste it, but do I want it enough to do the work?

The test starts now.

Breakfast this morning: 1/3 c leftover hash browns, 1 egg, 2 oz mexican seasoned ground beef, 1/8 c shredded cheddar.

Outline

Okie dokie, so I put together a rough outline of meals for next week based around proteins, I've determined that my stores are open tomorrow (or I can go early Friday - maybe better), and outlined minimum food prep that needs to happen Sunday when I get home. I've been tracking my food this week (a little high in fats & low in protein) and my meal plans are plug-n-play (protein + carb + veggies + fats), so I can adjust ingredients as needed to hit goals.

I'm excited!

I hope you have an enjoyable holiday. Take care.

Planning around travel

One of the toughest parts for me isn't making good choices when I travel (not that I always do, but if I want I do know how!), it's having the energy after a long car ride to get my butt to the store, buy the food, and prep it.

Next week t is out of town all week and we aren't getting back until Sunday afternoon. I'll be getting home from work late and will be hungry. I need stuff prepped that I can heat & eat or throw together quickly.

My plan is to make a plan Thursday night, shop before work on Friday (if the store isn't open Thursday) and maybe even do some prep if possible. That way Sunday I can have 1-2 meals ready to go for the start of the week.

Stay flexible, my friends.

It's not linear

In life no path is ever a perfectly straight line (at least, not in my life). We had a great family vacation this weekend, but there were also some frustrations, including some very limited food choices with no really good options. The scale was up a couple of pounds this morning, but I just rolled my eyes, packed my lunchbox, and went with it.

I'm putting my food in Sparkpeople - not even trying to hit any macro targets, just tracking to see where things fall out. At the end of the week I will adjust as needed. Since I plan my food in advance, keying it in isn't really that big of a step - I just like to be a drama llama about it. :-)

The Georgia Aquarium is really awesome! We had a great time and everyone agreed that booking the "Behind the Scenes" tour was the best part - highly recommend!

Anyway, good weekend, now back to reality!

Mixed feelings

As my weight loss slows, I keep coming back to the idea that maybe I should track my macros. At least track for a week to see where they are. I've reached a point where I really don't want to cut my calories any more and I feel like I'm doing as much as I can to be physically active (in and out of the gym), so macros seems to be the next logical place to make changes.

Can I just say I am dreading it? Tracking on paper is doable, but doing it online to that level of detail feels painful. But I am going to challenge myself to do it for a week (next week!) just to see where I am and go from there.

Take care.

Sale shorts

Good morning.

When we were in Wilmington for my birthday we went shorts shopping for the husband. In W-M I found some Avia running shorts I liked a lot for 10 dollars. I bought a couple of pair and have been enjoying them. Ellie at the gym asked me where I got them and she bought some (that's a great price for running shorts!).

Anyway, they are now on clearance for half price, so I bought 3 more pair. Now that I've lost weight, I'm actually wanting (and sometimes needing) to buy clothes. And I don't hate it as much as I used to.

Here's a quote from the blog Instant Loss: "When successfully losing weight there’s a temptation to avoid situations that may limit your control but I urge you not to. You’re sole purpose in life is not to lose weight, give yourself permission to enjoy yourself while you’re on your trip."

 That's the trick, isn't it? Maintaining a healthy lifestyle, not making food the focus, but not being afraid to enjoy it from time to time.

Yesterday was a good day - I ate well, enjoyed what I ate, and the bloat weight is coming back off.

Take care.

Figuring it out

I have been in a funk since yesterday morning and I've been struggling to figure out why. And really, the root cause only matters so much. The better question is what do I do now? I lost steam, didn't get much done yesterday, felt guilty about it, ended up going out to eat (unprepared for dinner), over ate, and felt another round of bad when I got on the scale this morning.

What's next?

I think I figured out what brought on the funk. I'm going to talk about it with hub and a friend and decide how I want to address it (Someone hurt my feelings. A lot.).

And move on. I know, easier said than done. But I got up, made breakfast, packed lunch, packed my gym bag, and set myself up for a good day.

I'm at work. I'm wearing some new (old) capris that fit again (which feels good!). I sorted through some of my costume stuff and am giving away several things that don't fit to friends that can use and will enjoy them.

I took a bunch of pet food and a cash donation to the Humane Society in honor of a friend's birthday. I went to church and helped cook a nice lunch for those who are in need. I did things to remind me that there is some decency in the world, and surrounded myself with people who care.

We are human. We hurt each other. We hurt. We deal with that in less than productive ways. What I don't need to do is pour the rest of the proverbial gallon on the floor after the glass of spilled milk.

Take care.

Work out!

Saturday morning's workout:

Gotta live my life

Happy Friday!

Lest you think I have this all figured out (there's a laugh), Here's what went through my head this morning when I got on the scale. "oh no! It's up a pound and a half/ Why??? I ate a really good dinner last night - seafood and veggies! Maybe we shouldn't go out to dinner Saturday so I can be sure to get back down."

There are so many things wrong with that line of thinking. We are going on a date Saturday night (something we haven't had time for lately). We don't eat out often, so we thought about choices, picked a nice restaurant, and booked reservations. And I'm gonna skip because I worked out hard and maybe my muscles are holding onto some water? Are inflamed and sore?

Yes, I want to lose weight - but not as quickly as possible so I can resume my life. This needs to be my life. Dinner at home tonight (homemade carnitas tacos), and we are going out Saturday. I will enjoy my meal, but probably cut it in half if its too big (but its a fancy place so who knows?). The scale may be up Sunday, but I'll just get on with it.

Have a good weekend!

Strange feeling

Good morning. Today I crossed the 70 pounds lost mark. Did you know that's the weight of an average 10 year old? It feels mostly unreal to me that I actually had that much weight to lose (well, more actually since I have more to go!). That is .. shocking.

Tuesday when he stopped for gas, T did buy me a 16 oz beer at the convenience store. I didn't drink it after I got home from the gym. Last night he said "that beer is still in the fridge if you want it". He was shocked when I said I didn't and then he remarked he couldn't believe I was leaving a beer untouched. Which makes me question whether my drinking had become problematic? Did he see it as problematic? Anyway, I told him I had a goal I was trying to hit (crossing the 70 pound mark). I weighed 151.7 this morning. In theory I could be in the 140s by the end of the month - that mythical land not seen since ??? early 2001? Late 2000? I have no record.

Anyway, I am keeping on keeping on. In spite of the stress early in the week, I am in a good place mentally, emotionally, physically.

Take care of yourself out there today!

Perfectly imperfect

I had a bunch scheduled for myself this week, plus it's been hectic with the husband trying frantically to get everything wrapped up for work. The first couple of evenings this week there was some stress eating. Then yesterday I got hit with a whammie when his class dates were moved - messing up our family trip to the Atlanta aquarium. Now he has to work and won't be able to go - and everything is already purchased. :-(

So after a day of feeling all the negative emotions - anger, sadness, disappointment etc., when t called on the way home and said he needed gas and did I want anything from the convenience store I replied "A 12 pack". I was only half joking. The idea of having a couple of beers and just .. switching off .. sounded lovely. He said no. I immediately changed into a new workout top I'd been saving for an emergency, and got my butt to the gym. I had an awesome workout.

See what I did there? I could've stayed mad with myself for 2 nights of eating some crap I didn't need. I felt my feelings, acknowledged what I would like to have done (at least part of me), but then I made the better choice and turned it around.

If you stay in the "beating yourself up" place, you won't move to a good place. It's easy to do the right thing from a place of caring & desire rather than shame.

Take care.

Great weekend

I had a great weekend - road trip with friends, day at home catching up (somewhat) yesterday. Food is bought & prepped, bathrooms are still dirty. LOL

Have a good day!

Super busy, super behind

Still running behind schedule. Le sigh. Oh well, my bathrooms will be dirty for another week. Fiddle dee dee.

Down 0.8 pounds this week. So, headed in the right direction.

Have a good weekend!

Crazy week

T is nearing the end of his training period. This week he is working 3rd shift - that won't be a regular thing but part of his training is to work a few days on each shift so he's familiar with everything. between that, being out Monday, a most of the day training at work, and having to turn in my laptop for some upgrades, this week has just been bananas. I'm tired, cranky, stretched too thin, and just generally feel like I have too much on my plate and not enough of me.

It hasn't been the greatest week, but it will end, things will normalize, and nothing really bad is going on. I just need to keep reminding myself of that!!

Take care.

New diet, cannot recommend

So I got food poisoning Sunday. That pretty much took the bulk of the day as well as Monday. I only threw up once, sadly I probably would have felt better had I thrown up sooner and more thoroughly.

In any case, I am in the office today. I am feeling better, but still sticking to fairly bland food and taking (yet another) day off from exercise.

Gah.

Safe arrival

Got to mom's at 8:15 last night - so before it got dark. Yay! Came through a bit of rain, but not bad. I considered bringing my scale with me, then decided that was ridiculous. I weighed yesterday and recorded that in the "Official Friday" slot - down 0.3 pounds for the week. Yeah, sometimes that's how it goes.

I packed a turkey & cheese (with a slice of bacon!) on Ezekiel bread for dinner last night. I was wanting something sweet when I got here and ended up having a muscle milk light for "dessert." This morning's breakfast was 2 eggs with 1/4 of an everything bagel, 1/4 of an avocado, a medium tomato, and 3 strawberries. I thoroughly enjoyed it!!

I hope you have a good weekend!

Same thing, different POV

If you don't read Sean Anderson's blog, I highly encourage it.  He spends a lot of time talking about the mental aspects of losing and keeping off weight.

Sean talks about not letting his "life streams" cross - so if there is a stressful situation in his life, not allowing it to affect his eating. I approach that from a slightly different angle.

First of all, there are some events in life you simply cannot control - they are going to happen. People say 'you can control your response' - well yeah, to some extent. It's easy to let something like getting cut off in traffic roll off your back (at least for me), but what if your spouse were diagnosed with an illness or you lost your job? There are certainly things you can do to help mitigate falling into a pit of stress, but let's face it: those things are stressful!

Having said that, I take a 2 pronged approach to life's stresses, with the first being: controlling my reactions. Easier said than done at times, but I've made good inroads on not letting life's ups and downs control my food intake. I have found that for me, it's far easier to work on handling the stress than prong #2: controlling my emotional eating.

Sean talks about #2 a lot, but I think really you have to work on both.

I had a good workout at the gym last night - I did double snatches for the first time! I typically do one arm snatches. So go me!

I am heading down to the beach right after work. :-)  My plan is to pack my dinner rather than buying something on the road. I am doing really well with recording my food & exercise to share with the trainer.

Take care.