Random

I think there is one thing many people who are either overweight or have been in an emotionally abusive relationship have in common: they no longer trust their instincts.  It makes sense to me.  Maybe your inner voice has led you down a path of being overweight, out of shape, and/or experiencing health issues as a result of your food choices. Maybe someone in your life (friend, boss, SO) has repeatedly told you that your feelings and responses are inappropriate or wrong. Either way the message is that your instincts are misleading you.

Once the message that you can't trust yourself has been accepted, it's tough to change. I know I took my last job for 2 reasons: 1) I saw it as a new and different opportunity (ignoring the warning signs) and 2) despite telling others and myself that I was okay with the time off, I wasn't.  After nearly 18 years of being the primary (sometimes sole) provider for my family, being out of work made me very uncomfortable.  As a result, I took on a misdefined role for which I was poorly suited. When your boss says "I think we set you up for failure", even they probably have realized their plan was poorly conceived. My response was "yes, you did."

I'm now in a role where I believe I can be successful, but a lot of the time I still feel skittish wondering whether I am doing things the right way.  Am I doing enough? I'm hoping I will feel more confident as time passes (I seem to be so far). I do like this job.