Wrapping up Christmas

Today T had to ride down to take a look at a site we are thinking of using for one of our medieval events, so I'm home alone.  Mom came down and lent a hand - my son and his friend did the final sanding on some mudding they had done.  This house had a ton of wallpaper, all from the 1970s or 1980s and totally not my taste.  We had a small hallway that needed the walls completely mudded after pulling off the wallpaper and a bathroom where we decided to simply mud the seams. 

Unfortunately, the mud my son bought was NOT of the dust free variety.  Mom came down and gave me a hand with the cleanup as well as starting to take down Christmas decorations.  T and I are flying out to visit with friends in Reno, leaving home Wednesday evening, so I want to have the house clean and the decorations put away before we head out.

Right now things are pretty hectic with the holidays, upcoming vacation, and a new dog who is not yet house trained.  We adopted Susie this week from the shelter.  She's a 2.5 year old Shepherd mix.  T's ex kept their dog and he couldn't bring the cats (I'm allergic and we have a pet door they could have easily gone out).  My big dog Mya passed away 3 months ago, and I wanted Jordan to have a companion dog plus I wanted T to have a dog that was "his".  Susie adores him, but we have to keep an eye on her to get her trained. 

Once we are back we will start tag teaming the gym and for now we are counting calories and making sure we get plenty of veggies, water, etc.

I had a wonderful holiday season - gifts, family, food, being with someone who loves the holiday!  My son & his girlfriend came up and it was so nice! 

My ex broke up with the woman he was seeing (the one started seeing either 5 minutes before or 5 minutes after he left me) on Christmas day.  Which was pretty crappy, especially since she has a 6 year old daughter and B has been in her life for 2 years AND they are locked in to a lease for another 6 months.  So yeah, I hate it for the little girl.  So, he continues to be the same self absorbed goober.  He did agree to pay half the cost of a train ticket so his mom could go up to Maryland to see her sister and grandkids, so he is at least helping her out.  I still remain in the mix on that, simply because Jan remains a part of our lives.  Ironically, Jan is crazy about T and is so happy for me - so that's nice. :-)

So this weekend is all about getting the house in order before we leave town.  We may stay up until midnight but we aren't going anywhere. 

Pictures of the house before we moved in:
Back:

 Bath 1 (seams are mudded so we can paint over wallpaper)

Bath 2 (wallpaper is removed and bath is repainted)

 (Guest room)

 (Master bedroom.  Sadly, we haven't touched the wallpaper or curtains yet.)

 car port and storage area in backyard - which is now fenced in.

 Former garage which was converted to a den.

 Dining room.  This wallpaper is still up.

 Three season porch out back.

From the street.

 Knotty pine kitchen.

 Living room.  It's 30 feet long, so we have it set up half as a living area and half with a formal dining table.

Updated pictures to come!

A little background

I am going to do a couple of brief recaps just to set the stage for where I am now.

I am a member of a non profit which is about recreating and sharing knowledge about the middle ages - everything from making clothing and accessories to armor to combat.  I first got involved back in 2000 and T was one of the first people I met.  We hit it off immediately - we had so much in common and enjoyed being around each other.  We dated for a while but we were both a little afraid of taking our relationship to the next level and didn't realize that our feelings were reciprocated, so we ended up breaking off our relationship.  While we remained friends, we gradually drifted apart, he quit the organization and moved on to other hobbies, and I moved to Florida. 

Fast forward to January of this year: I was 10 months out from my separation and in October of 2015 his wife admitted to an affair and asked for a divorce.  Apparently the marriage had been in trouble for quite some time, but as I can attest - a separation is difficult.  In any case - he began reaching out to old friends to build a support group - one of the things that had occurred was that he became isolated from "his" friends, and the joint friends weren't folks he felt he could really talk to.  He reached out to me via facebook, and we began chatting.

It quickly became apparent that the chemistry was still there.  We spent a LOT of time talking about our goals, our beliefs and values, our priorities: in short, all of the things I never was able to discuss with my spouse!  We realized that we were very much in the same place, shared core values and priorities, and that our feelings hadn't changed.  Within a month we were dating and when I purchased my house in July, he moved in.  He had been wanting to move back to this area (he was about 2 hours away) to be closer to his family - so it was logical as well as being what we both wanted. 

We're getting married this year - we know where, who we want there, we haven't picked a time.  We aren't in a huge hurry but know that we want to be together and married.  Crazy, right?  I had reached a point where I was cool with being alone - I still missed the idea being married, but not being married to my husband. being alone was far preferable to being unhappy in a relationship and the dating scene was beyond frustrating.  So once I was okay with where I was and wasn' looking - there he was.

I don't have a style.

Insomnia stinks.  Just read this article and I thought I'd share it:

http://www.theestablishment.co/2016/07/15/toddler-grandma-style-the-fashion-approach-that-will-set-you-free/

"Why not dress for the second-birthday/retirement party you want your life to be? You have nothing to lose but your self-imposed wardrobe restrictions."  Indeed.  I haven't had a personal style in years.  My style is whatever fits with a side of yoga pants (I have lived in workout clothes for years).  Maybe 2017 is the year to figure out my style.

 

A return to blogging (probably)

Well, good morning and happy holidays.

Apparently it's been nearly a year since I updated this thing.  Wow.  Where did that year go?  I can tell you I have crammed a tremendous amount into it!

In the past year I have:

1. Gotten a divorce
2. Reconnected with an old boyfriend and gotten engaged
3. Been laid off
4. Bought a house
5. Had my house in Florida on the market since April (under contract since May) and it still hasn't sold!

As you can see, this year has been a year of major stress - some very good, some really bad (as least financially).

I haven't made fitness or weight loss a priority - mostly it hasn't even been on my radar.  But T and I sat down last night and discussed our goals for next year, and we both agreed that weight loss and improved fitness was on both of our lists. 

He's been through as much as I have this year, so status quo has been okay as we navigated the rocks and shoals, but now we are both ready to do better.  We have begun simply - with maintaining a daily calorie goal and sticking to that.  He's dropped about 8 pounds and I've dropped a couple.  We did NOT want to wait until January 1 - why not start now if we really want to do this? was our thought process.  So we did.

It's been a crazy wonderful, crazy frustrating year.  Hopefully 2017 will be a year where we have a chance to regroup and spend less time reacting to what life throws our way and more time making intentional choices.

Take care!

My neglected blog

Good morning,

It's not that I am unfocused about eating well or exercising, it's just that write now my time and energy are so squeezed, I don't have a lot of either for posting or reading of blogs.

Doing fine - work is going well.

Good morning

Just wanted to do a quick check in again.  Work is still busy, I expect the days to be long for a while.  This weekend we are going to Wilmington to see my son (mom is going with me).  I am looking forward to that since he was home for Christmas for such a short time.

Not really reading a lot of blogs - I try to pop in now & again. 

Take care!

Wiped

Just wanted to check in.  I get home from work late, eat, and I am wiped out!!  I am walking at lunchtime and I do have my kettlebells here at home, but it's definitely going to take me a bit to find my groove.  In the meantime I am having a good time!  Tired, but good. :-)

Take care!

Lift off

The house is quiet, I'm jamming out to the "Zohan" soundtrack, and it is now COLD here!! :-O  But sunny, so the dogs and I will be taking a walk today.

I found a recipe for pumpkin pancakes in Shape magazine I plan to make for breakfasts this week.  I'm doing kimchi fried rice for lunches (it's mostly vegetables, I put maybe a quarter cup of brown rice in each serving).  Keeping dinners simple since I am wiped when I get home from work and my mom is not into cooking.

Back in September or early October my son and I made about 3 gallons of mead (a honey wine).  I plan to get that bottled this weekend, take my mom and MIL to see Star Wars, and I am meeting Janet at the gym for another workout tomorrow.  I am signed up for water aerobics for January, so I will be starting that back up.

I am thankful for my job - not only because money is nice but because I like the people and it really consumes a lot of my energy.  I did have some moments of anger and sadness at my ex over the holidays, but my energy is a lot more focused on work and on my future - a much better place to be. 

It continues to be a journey, but I feel a lot more positive!

Be well!

Happy New Year!

Here's to a better 2016 and good riddance to darn 2015! :-)  Went to bed at 9:30 last night - exhausting week.

Went to the gym this morning, so I started the new year off right!  After that I sat down and work on my book keeping.  I worked on my budget, reviewed my debt, balanced my checkbook etc.  Always a good thing to do periodically.

I have 3 simple goals for this year:

1. lose 60 pounds
2. Become debt free
3. Purchase a home (incurring some more debt, but that will be my only debt)

Simple, not necessarily easy. But very doable.

I hope you achieve your goals this year!!

2001

This is my 2001st post.  Unbelievable!

Today was a slow day at work, so it was certainly tempting to eat!  Luckily I didn't overdo it - I had my food packed.  Dinner was a really good veggie lasagna (heavy on veggies, light on noodles).  Tomorrow I am going to be riding in one of our trucks all day, so I plan to pack a lunch that doesn't require heating.

It's still really warm here (mid 70s) but stormy.  The weather is so weird!  I plan to get on the scale this Friday and see how I'm doing.

Have a good day tomorrow!

Ready for the work week

This has been a nice break, and I have another long weekend coming up! Food is all prepped. I'm relaxing for a bit before I head to the gym to work out. 

I hope you all have had a nice holiday.  take care!

Happy holidays!

Yep, this week has been as crazy and tiring as I expected.  It was a good week and a nice Christmas.  There were a couple moments of sadness, but overall really nice.

The weather here has been freakishly warm - in the 70s.  I thought we were going to have to turn the AC on!  My son set up the hot tub for me yesterday, but I haven't tried it out yet.  We didn't give each other a lot of gifts, just a few really thoughtful things.  It was a nice day.

Today I need to plan the menu, take a walk in the park, and I think we will go to Star Wars.  That's about it!

I hope you all enjoy your holidays and have a nice weekend!

Day 1 down!

Well, I survived day 1!  It was mostly filling out stuff in HR and orientation, being walked around to meet folks, and having lunch with the management team.  There is so much to do at this job.  I fully expect it to consume my life for the next few months.

I feel like things are beginning to come together....

Bonus post about counting calories

I might not have time or energy to post tomorrow, so I wanted to share this thought.

I know (and have experienced) that food tracking is pretty important in successfully losing weight.  I just don't like tracking throughout the day. I can do it, I just don't like doing it.  But I'm not a toddler, and I can do things I don't enjoy.  However, I have figured out a way to make it easier for me:  I prep my food on the weekend and count the calories as I cook it.

For example:  Today I made cottage cheese and oat pancakes. I counted the calories as I added the ingredients, so I know each pancake has roughly 50 calories (some a bit bigger, some a bit smaller).  Ditto for my pesto salad, which I made and put into 3 containers.  Each serving has around 275 calories.  I know the counts for 1 c grapes and 12 almonds (my snack).  Since I eat the same thing every day, I know how many calories I have going into dinner each night.  This way I only have to figure 1 meal (dinner) and 1 snack (after dinner) every day - the rest of the day is accounted for.  Some people would rather have variety - I'd rather have the food prepped and counted.

In short, do what works for you.  Set things up so you can succeed.

A new beginning

Happy Sunday! In less than 24 hours I will be at my new job.  I have a lot of feelings about this.  My last job was an 18 month contract - I hoped to get on permanently, but at the same time I wasn't as emotionally invested since I was a contractor.  And while there are perks to not being full time, I needed something with benefits since mine and my son's health insurance is through my husband's work, and that won't last forever.

I am excited because the company is much smaller than where I've been in the past (I worked at a major credit card company and one of the largest banks in America) and they treat it like family.  My boss works for the president that runs all the companies under the umbrella (I'll work for a subsidiary).  It's also a LOT of responsibility. So nervous, but excited.

Last night I ate a side of pasta with dinner.  Big mistake.  If there is one food that sets me off, it's pasta. I have no idea why!  I ate a smallish side portion, and still ended up feeling "nibbly" all evening.  I can eat a small serving of the Barilla protein plus, but last night was a reinforcement of why I have to stay away from the regular stuff.  I'm not normally sensitive to carbs, but pasta is the exception.

I had a great workout with Janet yesterday.  Today I am going for a walk in the park, getting ready for tomorrow, and watching some football.  I hope you have a nice day!

Weekend plans

I am meeting with Janet again today for a good workout.  I've got food planned for the week and the shopping list made.  This weekend will be shopping, food prep, laundry, and getting ready for work. :-)

The realtor I worked with to sell my NC house has moved, but she gave my name to another lady she thinks I will like.  I have started looking a bit on my own (online), but she is going to set me up on the MLS so I can start looking at houses!  Still a ways down the road, but exciting!

Last day

Today is my last weekday of unemployment before I start my new job Monday.  I am excited and nervous!  Last night I was feeling really sad - I have no idea why.  I started eating a second snack, then took myself to bed.

Yesterday I had Janet take my measurements - I will ask her to do it again in a couple of months to see my progress.  I don't measure myself, so that will be a neat additional measure of progress.

Today mom and I are hitting a couple of consignment shops (they do furniture and housewares) just to look around.  Yesterday I made a tablecloth and valences for mom's kitchen out of some pretty holiday fabric I bought last year.  I am thrilled with how they turned out.  Today I am making her a tote bag.

I still dream about my ex most every night, so I obviously still have a LOT of unresolved feelings.  (Not romantic, these are anxiety dreams!)  I miss being married, even if things were pretty bad.  I hope that at some point down the road I will meet someone that will be a better partner to me. 

But I am spending time with friends, and making time for those connections.  On the way to Wilmington last weekend, we stopped in Cary to have breakfast with a good friend and his girlfriend - that sort of thing. While there we stopped by and hung out for a while with a couple I've been friends with for many years and we made plans to see each other again.  I know I have a lot of wonderful people in my life, and I am thankful for that.

Reality Check

So, on Tuesday the trainer (Janet) gave me an assessment to fill out, which asked for my height and weight. I brought it home, filled it out, and this morning got on the scale.  Ouch.  My guess the other day was correct - I have gained exactly 15 pounds.  I am now officially the highest I have ever weighed in my entire life. 

I won't lie, I am ashamed, embarrassed, sad, angry.... well, you get the idea. As the saying goes "done can't be undone", but in this case, it kinda can.  I can lose the weight.

I am having a hard time writing this - I spent the first years of this blog fretting about losing 10 measly pounds, and now I need to lose 60 or so.  Dear lord.

I'd say no time like the present, but trying on my dress pants for work 2 days ago was all the wake up call I needed.

This morning I weighed 210.8.

Thank you!

Once again, thank you for the well wishes!  I am excited.  The work is similar to things I've done in the past, but it's an entirely new industry.  So I expect to be brain dead when I get home for the next 6 months or so!

I am still have some rough evenings, but overall things are smoothing out on several levels.  The support and love of my friends and family, the knowledge that I have a job with a good company, getting to the gym with the trainer .. it's all helping.

I won't say I'm out of this funk/weight gain ride I've been on for nearly a year (I've gained 15 pounds since the ex left), but I think I've made a lot of progress.

Here's to hoping 2016 is a lot better than this year has been!!! 

I got a job

Start next Monday!