Yeah, I wouldn’t read me either

These days this blog seems to be hanging out in the doldrums. I have some good stuff to blog about today, which is a nice change of pace. I also have 1 not good thing to blog about.

The bad thing is that I totally lost my temper with my son this morning. With hub working 7 days a week, I really need the boy to help out around the house some, which he totally does not do. The only chore I ask him to do consistently is to walk the dogs, which he will do maybe once a week if I threaten him with death or loss of phone.

Anyway, I yelled and cried and said a bad thing when I told him “I feel like I am raising a selfish and ungrateful child.” My dad never has a good thing to say to me – he was always critical and always made me feel bad about myself. I don’t want to do that same thing, but in my frustration I find myself slipping into that dreadful pattern.

I am getting hub to meet me at our favorite Korean place for dinner and I’m hoping the boy will tag along as well (he’ll be with his grandma, but her place is near the restaurant). I want to apologize, and explain (for the 57 bazillionth time) why I need his help right now. Ugh.

Today hub will be doing some supervising – stuff on the job site isn’t being cleaned up the way it should. The assistant foreman has been slacking and this is hub’s chance to show that he can do this as well. We’ll see what happens. He’s been taking extra classes when they are offered and working hard – I am hoping it will pay off for him.

I had a kickbutt workout this morning at the gym. I used the cardio coach volume 2 CD (on my mp3 player), which is a very good interval workout. I may listen to the instrumental version tomorrow when I lift weights – I’d love to get that intensity back on the weights.

I don’t know if I believe that I can make a difference in my weight, but last night I had an okay after dinner snack – a glass of wine and a piece of cheese toast. I know it doesn’t sound the healthiest, but I portion my calories across 6 meals per day, so I have 200-300 calories left for end of day. That may not be the most nutritious snack, but it satisfies my need for “comfort/ treat” food without being too terrible. If I eat healthy the rest of the day, I think a piece of cheese, a slice of reduced calorie wheat bread, and a glass of wine has a place in my life.

I have gobs to do this weekend, but my mom has offered to come over & lend a hand with some housework, bless her. I do have to drive to Raleigh on Sunday (ugh), but other than that I’m home. The next weekend is my big murder mystery event on Saturday, Sunday there is a meeting I should go to, but I’m gonna pass. I think it’s clear that we have a lot going on (did I mention that the boy’s grandpa was rushed to the hospital this past weekend?). I have to make the family and me a priority or its gonna end badly…..