Sailing off the side of a mountain

Did you watch the Tour yesterday? Did you see the guy, drinking out of his water bottle, and as a result, drifting to the side of the road, then off the road and into the Alpine meadow? I admit, I was laughing my a$$ off (it’s that whole German schadenfreude mentality). Not only did it give me a new motto “Friends don’t let friends drink and drift”, it got me to thinking about the last couple of days.

Remember when I said I didn’t want to go to Pa, but I didn’t want the hubby to drive alone? Well, I told him I’d go, then I immediately started to get ill. I had a migraine threatening most of the day yesterday, my face is broken out, and by last night I was so demoralized than I became the helpless victim as the alien inhabiting my body bought beer & Chinese take-out.

In short, I made a choice that was bad for me and my stress levels went through the roof, sending mind & body spiraling into oblivion. I have a ton to do, and I’m tired. But because I have no sense of balance in my life, I was going to do what was best for hubby, while downplaying what I really needed. Only my body staged a rebellion. Hub is insisting I stay home, and I am grateful.

As in so many parts of my life, I utterly lack balance. I have been married before, and frankly I can’t say I was the best wife. I’m not the best wife now either, but I try to be a good wife. And I love my husband, so sometimes I ignore what I really need. Sometimes self-sacrifice is the right thing to do, sometimes it isn’t, but I haven’t really figured out how to tell the difference. Gee, sounds a lot like my diet & exercise habits, huh?

When it was said & done, that just means I’ve already eaten 1 (of 2) of this week’s cheat meals. Done, move on. Got up and ran. Thank you that we had a thunderstorm yesterday which cleaned some of the humidity out of the air. My run actually felt pretty decent this morning.

Also, I’m not a vending machine ho, but I sure wish they would stop with the buffalo wing flavored pretzels. I’m a hot sauce fan (I own different types for different things, and I firmly believe hot sauce goes well on popcorn, pizza, and eggs – as well as most other savory foods). I had to score a bag this morning while heating my breakfast, just in case they ran out. Pitiful. At least today I will eat them in place of something, as opposed, to “in addition!” Bye bye healthy food – you’ve been bumped by buffalo pretzels. Pretzels loaded in fat. Curse you, fast food industry! Hey – maybe I’ll just save them in my drawer for a rainy day (proverbial I mean, it’s raining right now). I wonder how long I can hold out?????

I’m sad about Jens – even though I think their team acted poorly in the TT, he seems like a genuinely nice guy. It’s a bad break to get sick during the tour. Maybe their team is cursed for their poor sportsmanship – the ranks are getting thin over at CSC.