Three week streak!

First of all, I have lost weight 3 weeks in a row. The past 2 weeks that has been 0.1 pounds - lol. I did speak with my FNP Wednesday and she gave me a couple of suggestions/ recommendations as well as reminding me that the last 10 pounds are the toughest. So I have a game plan.

This week has been incredibly tough. Mom made what I am calling her second annual hurricane evacuation vacation to my house. Which is nice, but a change from routine. T has jacked up his knee so I am doing his chores as well as my own while we figure out what is going on and what that will mean. My son and his gf opted to stay on Carolina Beach for the hurricane for several reasons. And while I agreed that it was the logical decision given the downgraded status of the storm, that doesn't mean this momma wasn't worried.

I'd say I'm glad for the weekend but I'm afraid it's a case of no rest for the wicked. Ha ha. Too much to do. I am going to try and pace myself, do what needs to be done, and include some fun things.

Take care.

Boringsville

Happy Hump day! The vestry meeting went okay - we are planning to reopen the lunch program in October. So we have work to do between then and now. Starting my PMP in a couple of weeks is just going to add a layer of busy, so I need to nail down the cleaning lady (starting next week) and meal planning. I won't be able to go to the gym on Saturday since my class is all day, so going 2 evenings per week will be imperative.

I found a really good evening snack!! Vintage Surprise Dip is really yummy and the addition of green beans means the calorie count for a reasonable portion isn't crazy. I added some dried minced onion for a nice extra punch, but its a solid dip as is. I paired it with a (weighed out) serving of pork rinds for a satisfying and low carb evening snack. It's a keeper!

Have a good day!

Food prep

Howdy, howdy, welcome back from a long holiday weekend. I did my best imitation of a house elf and did a bunch of stuff around the house & yard, so that's good! I overdid it a couple of times, but overall it was a restful AND productive weekend!

When T was teaching, he got home early and was done for the day. We pretty much alternated cooking duties and took leftovers for our lunches. That model is no longer working. He comes home more tired, and doesn't take a lunch since he works in a restaurant.

For lunches I've flipped back to an earlier model where I prep 4 lunches for the week, doing something different on the 5th day. These days that's my "at home" day, but I used to indulge in the food truck or going out once a week. With no need for the leftovers, I am planning 4 servings but we eat the meal twice in a row. So it looks something like this:

Mon & Tue: meal 1
Wed: meal 2
Thur & Fri meal 3
Sat: out maybe
Sun: ?

We generally eat out once a week. This model lets me prep on Sunday (the day I'm doing food rep anyway) for Mon & Tues, then Wednesday I generally work at home so I'll prep for Thu & Fri. I'm not really cooking when I get home (since I get home so late), but T doesn't have a lot he has to do either. That frees him up to relax, work on the house and/or yard, etc. Since we're only eating the same meal twice, and only doing that twice, we still feel like we're getting a good variety and I don't feel like I'm overwhelmed with planning, shopping, and prep for a bunch of different meals.It works for us because we both like leftovers and we both have input into the meals we eat. That way we are both getting our favorites into regular rotation.

This week's meals:
Breakfast: turkey burger on a slice of ezekiel bread
Snack: 12 almonds & a clementine
Lunch: spicy salmon bowl
Snack: string cheese or almonds & clementine
Dinner - varies as above.

My mom came in from Wilmington today to wait out the storm, so we'll need ot change up dinner plans a bit.

I went to the kbell gym Saturday and yesterday. That worked well since I typically go Tuesday night but can't tonight due to a vestry meeting on re-opening the lunch program.

I hope you had a good weekend. Take care!

Same same

Well my weight is the same as last Friday (well, down 0.1 pounds lol). Okay. This has felt a bit like turning an aircraft carrier in terms of getting my good habits back, but I am getting there. I went to the kettlebell gym again last night and did a great workout. I have a solid plan for getting food prep manageable and I am interviewing another potential cleaning lady Monday.

Have a great long weekend!

It's been a week

Work has been busy, life has been crazy. having said that, I'm back at the kettlebell gym and food is largely on track. I've just been too busy - or too cranky! - to post.

But I'm still here, and doing ok despite this week's best efforts.

Logging it

Good morning.

I am taking tomorrow off and we are headed to the beach as soon as T gets home from work. Yay!! Since I won't be here tomorrow, I logged this morning's weigh in for the week. 153.6 - down 1.6 pounds from last Friday. I won't make my goal of being back under 150 by the end of the month, but God laughs when we set deadlines. I am headed in the right direction, feeling much better, and am okay with where I am.

Take care.

A work in progress

It's scary how easy it is to return to old habits. I've been dealing with some major stressors - one is a work issue (mostly resolved I think) and the other is a crappy insurance/ incorrectly submitted medical bill issue. I left work yesterday VERY upset. I called T and asked if he wanted anything from the grocery on the way home. So I stopped and got a soda and 2 boxes of TGIF appetizers. After dinner I made a couple of each for each of us. Then he had to go back into work and I finished both boxes. It was scary.

This morning I woke up at 3:33 very shaken. I asked myself what I could do to "take back my power." I made the medical billing thing my top priority this morning. I sent what additional info I had to the patient advocate gal I'm working with. (What does it say about our system that companies hire other companies to deal with medical claim issues for their employees to salvage productive work time?). I then got every bill I've paid so far this year and sent them over to our reimbursement group. It's like an FSA, but the company will pay after you've spent $500 out of pocket (up to $2000). I submitted $528 for the year so far, so if I do get hit with this, at least I will be able to get reimbursed.

Still frustrating, but at least I know I won't get slapped with a big medical bill out of the blue. Or if I do I can be reimbursed for it.

I am trying hard to reclaim my peace and focus.I sent a note to Ellie at the gym saying I would see her Tuesday. No, I haven't been to the kettlebell gym since we got back. I have been using my kettlebell at home and going to Anytime Fitness though. But I need that extra bit to push me, so I set myself up to be accountable to someone for going next week.

Have a good day!

Turning the aircraft carrier

For whatever reason, getting back into the groove has been so hard. I am trying to be patient with myself, making consistent, positive baby steps back to where I was. It's not a race, every improvement is improvement, and it's okay.

I need that on a repeat loop in my brain until it all gets back into place.  I am frustrated with myself, and trying hard not to be. Boy, isn't that a fun cycle to be in!

I control my choices

I have several stressors right now. T and I are having work stress, and I am struggling to get back into my ore holiday groove. This weekend I told myself I just needed to do a 15 minute kettlebell workout, which I did. I felt better! Food wasn't totally on point, but its getting there. I did another 15 minute workout this morning. the dog was upset I was closed off in the guest room and peed on the floor to show her consternation. UGH!  Oh well, I cleaned it up and moved on. I am heading to the gym in a few minutes for my lunch break.

Breakfast this week is baked corn tortillas with refried beans, and egg, and a little chorizo for flavor.
Lunches are baked catfish, 14/ small potato and cold veggie salad.
Snacks are boiled egg and a string cheese.
Dinners vary.

Have a good week.

Time to get out of the river

Happy Friday. The title refers to the river of "denial" of course - lol. Seriously though, I popped up 1.5 before I left, then had a crazy week once back, then had to go on a business trip. I got on the scale today to a total of 5.6 pound gain - I'm sitting at 155.2.

So yeah, ugh - and it's funny, but I can feel even that little bit in my clothes. Workouts haven't been great this week, but food has been dialed back down and I am back at the gym. Not sure if I'll get below 150 in 2 weeks, but I will do my best!

Have a good weekend - here's to not going anywhere! Yay!

Weekend Recap, and ... What's next

As my mom wrote my cousin "We didn't slap anyone!" Yeah, people who haven't bothered to see Alma in a decade or more (I'm talking grandkids, not distant kin) came out of the woodwork to see each other and enjoy a free feed. Ugh. We made an appearance and left. I enjoyed the pool at the hotel - highlight of the trip.

Got on the scale this morning - up a pound from Friday. No bueno. Time to find my routine.

I've been thinking about what I want to accomplish (fitness wise) the rest of the year. Here's what I'm thinking.

Goals:

Get back to where I was on the scale (by end of August)
Under 140 (end of year)
Under 20% body fat (end of year?)
Pull up ???
Begin training squat and bench press (begin before end of year)

Not sure how it will develop - I haven't even gotten back to the gym yet. T's work schedule is insane. I'm doing everything at the house and that includes cutting the grass. I'm exhausted. But this is just temporary.

Take care.

Tough week

This has been a tough week. T's work schedule has been insane, my work has been stressful. Mom and I are driving to Georgia tomorrow, returning Sunday. I've been handling everything at home because T simply hasn't had any time at home to help out. Not his fault, just the reality this week.

I haven't managed the stress as well as I could have, but it is what it is. I gained 2.6 pounds while on vacation. Totally not a bit deal at all, I just really want to get back into my routine. Next week promises to be crazy. Working at home Monday, then to Atlanta a couple of days for a business trip. I'm trying to be smart and set us up for success.

Tonight's dinner is prepped and ready to pop into the oven when I get home. There are a couple of meals of leftovers for T while I am gone. I've hired our pet sitter to come feed critters since his work schedule is so bananas - so that's off his plate.

I'm hiring a cleaning person to do a deep clean Monday - that will help me feel better about the house. I'm planning an easy dinner Monday with plenty of leftovers for Tuesday. We'll go out Wednesday, T will cook Thursday, and I have an easy meal planned for next Friday. Then I will have a glorious weekend at home!

Take care.

I'm back

We are home safe, back at work. We have not unpacked - we dumped everything out of the car and onto the back porch! LOL This week is as hectic as can be, but I'm trying to get back into a routine. Anyway, busy day but I wanted you to know that we made it home safely after a nice trip!

Take care.

When the going gets tough

Mom had to put her dog Lulu down yesterday. It was hard. I've had a tough couple of days and I won't lie, I have done a bit of emotional eating. I also did a bit of beating myself up about it (like that ever helps!).

This morning I weighed myself (scale was up 2 pounds) and moved on. I fixed breakfast, packed lunch and snacks, put meat for dinner in the crock pot. I'm going to the gym at lunch (I did HIIT yesterday, I'll do 2.5 miles on the elliptical at lunch today), then I'll go to the kettlebell gym after work. Then I'll go home and have a yummy dinner (Korean beef bowl with plenty of veggies and a mix of rice & cauli rice), and chill on the couch with my husband for a bit.

I'm okay, this happens, it's what comes next that matters. And whether I'm this side of the 150 mark or the other when I get up Friday morning, no one but me is going to know, because no one else would notice 1-2 pounds.

Take care of yourself today.

Today was the day

TGIF and hurray for autopilot y'all. I lost 2 pounds this week, and I now weight 149.6 - my lowest weight since before I started tracking in October of 2001.

I'm getting close!

My initial goal is 140 - and I will go from there.

Have a great weekend!!!

I leave you with this: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2QiasaYdr0&feature=youtu.be&fbclid=IwAR2rD8xC81_KaHJkOZpYnS4qBfUIWkmz4c66vHRIhu15waibsG8XYV3o30Q

Still trucking along

Good morning!

Life and work have been bananas this week and I haven't had time to sit down and write. It's been nuts. Fine, just too much to do.

To answer a question in the comments: Sparkpeople has a weekly summary chart on the page:

You can tell I hadn't started yet. It fills in raw numbers, but it's pretty easy to back into the percentages with all the numbers neatly in one place.

Having explained all that, my plans to meticulously track this week have been completely derailed. Tuesday I had to work off a loaner laptop and ... blah blah excuse excuse. But since I had planned up front and had done some basic prep Sunday (including making a list of what needed to be prepped each evening), my food plan has been on auto pilot.

Also, I fly out a week from tomorrow for our annual medieval camping in Pennsylvania trip and I haven't even started to pack. Y'all, I need a break!!

Take care.

You do you

BTW, T made it home safely last night. I slept like I had been given a sleeping pill. It was great.

One of the cool side benefits of getting older is that you care less about what other people think. Last night I (for the second time in my life) rocked a sports bra style workout top at the gym. Sure my midsection still has fluff (no 6 pack here!) and my belly (which was mostly covered by shorts) has stretch marks from pregnancy, but my back is really starting to look good and wearing it made me feel strong. And a tad weird.

Doing things my own way has spilled over into other aspects of my life, including nutrition. This week I have meticulously weighed and measured so I could know what (and how much) food I was putting in my body, and how I felt as a result. This is an idea that had been rolling around in my head, but was reinforced by a podcast I listened to.

Are you a podcast person? I'm not but my husband is and Ben Greenfield is a long time favorite. An episode on optimal diet we listened to recently (okay, my husband made me listen to in his car! lol) really resonated with me. Ben's premise (backed by research) is that for all that we are alike, the spectrum of differences is greater than we think. Our ancestors adapted to different diets in different parts of the world, meaning that we are better adapted to eating a certain way. We're pretty amazing and can run on most anything for fuel, but we work better on some.

As I get closer to my goal, I am trying to hone in on what foods fuel performance and good health as well as help me lose the last of the weight. I picked a fairly standard starting point:

Macros Based on The Zone (1)	% Of Total
30% Protein	30%
40% Carbohydrate	40%
30% Fat	30%

I pretty consistently went under on the carbs and over on the protein. I felt pretty good, but my overall calorie consumption was on the low side and I felt hungry some.

Yesterday:

I am going to change the targets for the upcoming week and see how that goes. I'll work on that this weekend and let you know what I come up with. 

If you are curious, here's everything I ate yesterday (pretty typical):

The result: I'm at 151.6 pounds this morning - "only" down 0.9 pounds from last week, but a new low! So yay!

Have an awesome weekend!

Interesting

So far this little experiment has been interesting. Yesterday I worked at home so I could be more flexible with my snacks. I had a cup of coffee with 2 prunes and peanut butter in the afternoon. Two prunes have 11 grams of carbs. So 2 little prunes make a difference in my bottom line carb consumption, but I don't feel like they are "bad."

I picked the ratios I did simply because they were a place to start. If I use my actual consumption, I think that carb number would be lower than the initial target, and I will adjust accordingly since so far I feel pretty good - not overly hungry and pretty steady energy levels. I may also up my lean protein portions at mealtimes - I started with 4 oz. but I'm having to use protein shakes to get that number higher.

Very little movement on the scale, but I feel good and I plan to keep going!

Have a good day.

Better

So here's yesterday:

Better across the board, still low on calories. I wasn't hungry though. That was the difference between 1) eating a more typical meal v. store bought veggie lasagna and 2) rye wasa & hummus for 2 snacks v. boiled egg.

While I say I wasn't hungry, I was also feeling a bit anxious. Could be some stress going on right now, could be T being out of town, could be tracking my food so closely. I keep reminding myself it's an experiment and I can change it up as needed.

Lots of stressful stuff right now - drama in my hobby (ugh!), mom's dog not doing well, ex MIL going in for a heart catheritization (I have no idea how to spell that word). Is it Friday yet? Oh, and totally not packed for vacation!

Take care and I'll try to do the same, okay?

Day 1, and bra confession

When I was overweight, I wore cheap sports bras all the time. This kind:

I probably have a billion with the elastic worn out (and I've tossed a billion more!). I wore them ALL THE TIME. To "work out" (which wasn't very strenuous), to work, where ever I was going and whatever I was wearing. Yes, it totally gave me a uniboob and no it wasn't flattering. It was comfortable and I didn't care. And at roughly $3 a bra.... whatever, right?

Only sometime along the way I started to care. So I dug through my old clothes and found a couple of bras that worked until I lost more weight. The ones I have that are the correct size are either no longer comfortable or worn out.

The 2 I bought at Kohl's are Warner brand, underwire, with enough "padding" that nipples won't show through at work, but not overly padded or push up. (Why do you need that much padding in a C cup anyway?). For workouts I am using some of the same cheap sports bras, only racerback. I do have a couple of more heavy duty ones, but since I walk, use the elliptical, or lift weights as my primary forms of exercise, there isn't much in the way of high impact exercise going on so they work fine so far. But yeah, a good bra is so worth it.

Here is where I ended up at the end of the day yesterday:

I wasn't particularly hungry, but I left a lot (especially protein) on the table. Let's see how today goes!

Take care.

Good weekend

Good morning and happy Monday! LOL

I hope you had a nice weekend, whatever you did. We went to the beach and had an awesome time! I was down to one non sports bra that fit, so I ponied up and bought a couple of new ones at Kohl's. $60 for 2 bras - yikes! But they fit well and are a good brand and they should last, plus they should fit for the rest of my weight loss unless I lose a bunch (more) in the cup. And I picked up a couple of tops for work at the thrift shop that I didn't need but I like.

It was good to go, and it's good to be home. Did okay with food - scale was up 0.2 pounds this morning - so flat for the weekend. i did a bunch of food prep and so now the work begins.

T headed out for Atlanta this morning for his training class. It's going to be weird to be by myself all week!

For breakfast I made a (sort of) chicken and rice casserole - 4 oz. chicken, 1/2 c rice, 1/2 steamed broccoli, sauteed onion, bell pepper, and celery. It's tasty but a bit on the dry side. Lunch is a portion of Aldi vegetable lasagna and a salad (left over from last night). Dinner is from Food cart style chicken salad (so yummy!), and snacks are 2 T hummus with a wasa cracker (snack at 10 and then this afternoon). I added a boiled egg onto the afternoon snack to help balance macros.

I've entered what I know and I am low on protein for sure, I will need to make a protein shake for dessert this evening.

So we'll see how my little experiment goes. Here's what I set as an initial target:

Total Calories/Day	1,500
Macros Based on The Zone (1)	% Of Total	Grams/Day
30% Protein	30%	113
40% Carbohydrate	40%	150
30% Fat	30%	50

Have a good day!

Time to walk the talk

Y'all, I am now stuck at 152-ish. I've been (slightly) up the past 2 weeks. It's not that my eating is bad or out of control, it's just enough that I'm not seeing results. The closer you get to goal, the harder it is to lose. Easy to write, but a tough reality to live! Lol

I really, really, really want to see 149.9 before I leave to vacation 3 weeks from today. Two weeks ago I was at 151.7 - this morning I was 152.5. UGH!!!!! I want it so bad I can taste it, but do I want it enough to do the work?

The test starts now.

Breakfast this morning: 1/3 c leftover hash browns, 1 egg, 2 oz mexican seasoned ground beef, 1/8 c shredded cheddar.

Outline

Okie dokie, so I put together a rough outline of meals for next week based around proteins, I've determined that my stores are open tomorrow (or I can go early Friday - maybe better), and outlined minimum food prep that needs to happen Sunday when I get home. I've been tracking my food this week (a little high in fats & low in protein) and my meal plans are plug-n-play (protein + carb + veggies + fats), so I can adjust ingredients as needed to hit goals.

I'm excited!

I hope you have an enjoyable holiday. Take care.

Planning around travel

One of the toughest parts for me isn't making good choices when I travel (not that I always do, but if I want I do know how!), it's having the energy after a long car ride to get my butt to the store, buy the food, and prep it.

Next week t is out of town all week and we aren't getting back until Sunday afternoon. I'll be getting home from work late and will be hungry. I need stuff prepped that I can heat & eat or throw together quickly.

My plan is to make a plan Thursday night, shop before work on Friday (if the store isn't open Thursday) and maybe even do some prep if possible. That way Sunday I can have 1-2 meals ready to go for the start of the week.

Stay flexible, my friends.

It's not linear

In life no path is ever a perfectly straight line (at least, not in my life). We had a great family vacation this weekend, but there were also some frustrations, including some very limited food choices with no really good options. The scale was up a couple of pounds this morning, but I just rolled my eyes, packed my lunchbox, and went with it.

I'm putting my food in Sparkpeople - not even trying to hit any macro targets, just tracking to see where things fall out. At the end of the week I will adjust as needed. Since I plan my food in advance, keying it in isn't really that big of a step - I just like to be a drama llama about it. :-)

The Georgia Aquarium is really awesome! We had a great time and everyone agreed that booking the "Behind the Scenes" tour was the best part - highly recommend!

Anyway, good weekend, now back to reality!

Mixed feelings

As my weight loss slows, I keep coming back to the idea that maybe I should track my macros. At least track for a week to see where they are. I've reached a point where I really don't want to cut my calories any more and I feel like I'm doing as much as I can to be physically active (in and out of the gym), so macros seems to be the next logical place to make changes.

Can I just say I am dreading it? Tracking on paper is doable, but doing it online to that level of detail feels painful. But I am going to challenge myself to do it for a week (next week!) just to see where I am and go from there.

Take care.

Sale shorts

Good morning.

When we were in Wilmington for my birthday we went shorts shopping for the husband. In W-M I found some Avia running shorts I liked a lot for 10 dollars. I bought a couple of pair and have been enjoying them. Ellie at the gym asked me where I got them and she bought some (that's a great price for running shorts!).

Anyway, they are now on clearance for half price, so I bought 3 more pair. Now that I've lost weight, I'm actually wanting (and sometimes needing) to buy clothes. And I don't hate it as much as I used to.

Here's a quote from the blog Instant Loss: "When successfully losing weight there’s a temptation to avoid situations that may limit your control but I urge you not to. You’re sole purpose in life is not to lose weight, give yourself permission to enjoy yourself while you’re on your trip."

 That's the trick, isn't it? Maintaining a healthy lifestyle, not making food the focus, but not being afraid to enjoy it from time to time.

Yesterday was a good day - I ate well, enjoyed what I ate, and the bloat weight is coming back off.

Take care.

Figuring it out

I have been in a funk since yesterday morning and I've been struggling to figure out why. And really, the root cause only matters so much. The better question is what do I do now? I lost steam, didn't get much done yesterday, felt guilty about it, ended up going out to eat (unprepared for dinner), over ate, and felt another round of bad when I got on the scale this morning.

What's next?

I think I figured out what brought on the funk. I'm going to talk about it with hub and a friend and decide how I want to address it (Someone hurt my feelings. A lot.).

And move on. I know, easier said than done. But I got up, made breakfast, packed lunch, packed my gym bag, and set myself up for a good day.

I'm at work. I'm wearing some new (old) capris that fit again (which feels good!). I sorted through some of my costume stuff and am giving away several things that don't fit to friends that can use and will enjoy them.

I took a bunch of pet food and a cash donation to the Humane Society in honor of a friend's birthday. I went to church and helped cook a nice lunch for those who are in need. I did things to remind me that there is some decency in the world, and surrounded myself with people who care.

We are human. We hurt each other. We hurt. We deal with that in less than productive ways. What I don't need to do is pour the rest of the proverbial gallon on the floor after the glass of spilled milk.

Take care.

Work out!

Saturday morning's workout:

Gotta live my life

Happy Friday!

Lest you think I have this all figured out (there's a laugh), Here's what went through my head this morning when I got on the scale. "oh no! It's up a pound and a half/ Why??? I ate a really good dinner last night - seafood and veggies! Maybe we shouldn't go out to dinner Saturday so I can be sure to get back down."

There are so many things wrong with that line of thinking. We are going on a date Saturday night (something we haven't had time for lately). We don't eat out often, so we thought about choices, picked a nice restaurant, and booked reservations. And I'm gonna skip because I worked out hard and maybe my muscles are holding onto some water? Are inflamed and sore?

Yes, I want to lose weight - but not as quickly as possible so I can resume my life. This needs to be my life. Dinner at home tonight (homemade carnitas tacos), and we are going out Saturday. I will enjoy my meal, but probably cut it in half if its too big (but its a fancy place so who knows?). The scale may be up Sunday, but I'll just get on with it.

Have a good weekend!

Strange feeling

Good morning. Today I crossed the 70 pounds lost mark. Did you know that's the weight of an average 10 year old? It feels mostly unreal to me that I actually had that much weight to lose (well, more actually since I have more to go!). That is .. shocking.

Tuesday when he stopped for gas, T did buy me a 16 oz beer at the convenience store. I didn't drink it after I got home from the gym. Last night he said "that beer is still in the fridge if you want it". He was shocked when I said I didn't and then he remarked he couldn't believe I was leaving a beer untouched. Which makes me question whether my drinking had become problematic? Did he see it as problematic? Anyway, I told him I had a goal I was trying to hit (crossing the 70 pound mark). I weighed 151.7 this morning. In theory I could be in the 140s by the end of the month - that mythical land not seen since ??? early 2001? Late 2000? I have no record.

Anyway, I am keeping on keeping on. In spite of the stress early in the week, I am in a good place mentally, emotionally, physically.

Take care of yourself out there today!

Perfectly imperfect

I had a bunch scheduled for myself this week, plus it's been hectic with the husband trying frantically to get everything wrapped up for work. The first couple of evenings this week there was some stress eating. Then yesterday I got hit with a whammie when his class dates were moved - messing up our family trip to the Atlanta aquarium. Now he has to work and won't be able to go - and everything is already purchased. :-(

So after a day of feeling all the negative emotions - anger, sadness, disappointment etc., when t called on the way home and said he needed gas and did I want anything from the convenience store I replied "A 12 pack". I was only half joking. The idea of having a couple of beers and just .. switching off .. sounded lovely. He said no. I immediately changed into a new workout top I'd been saving for an emergency, and got my butt to the gym. I had an awesome workout.

See what I did there? I could've stayed mad with myself for 2 nights of eating some crap I didn't need. I felt my feelings, acknowledged what I would like to have done (at least part of me), but then I made the better choice and turned it around.

If you stay in the "beating yourself up" place, you won't move to a good place. It's easy to do the right thing from a place of caring & desire rather than shame.

Take care.

Great weekend

I had a great weekend - road trip with friends, day at home catching up (somewhat) yesterday. Food is bought & prepped, bathrooms are still dirty. LOL

Have a good day!

Super busy, super behind

Still running behind schedule. Le sigh. Oh well, my bathrooms will be dirty for another week. Fiddle dee dee.

Down 0.8 pounds this week. So, headed in the right direction.

Have a good weekend!

Crazy week

T is nearing the end of his training period. This week he is working 3rd shift - that won't be a regular thing but part of his training is to work a few days on each shift so he's familiar with everything. between that, being out Monday, a most of the day training at work, and having to turn in my laptop for some upgrades, this week has just been bananas. I'm tired, cranky, stretched too thin, and just generally feel like I have too much on my plate and not enough of me.

It hasn't been the greatest week, but it will end, things will normalize, and nothing really bad is going on. I just need to keep reminding myself of that!!

Take care.

New diet, cannot recommend

So I got food poisoning Sunday. That pretty much took the bulk of the day as well as Monday. I only threw up once, sadly I probably would have felt better had I thrown up sooner and more thoroughly.

In any case, I am in the office today. I am feeling better, but still sticking to fairly bland food and taking (yet another) day off from exercise.

Gah.

Safe arrival

Got to mom's at 8:15 last night - so before it got dark. Yay! Came through a bit of rain, but not bad. I considered bringing my scale with me, then decided that was ridiculous. I weighed yesterday and recorded that in the "Official Friday" slot - down 0.3 pounds for the week. Yeah, sometimes that's how it goes.

I packed a turkey & cheese (with a slice of bacon!) on Ezekiel bread for dinner last night. I was wanting something sweet when I got here and ended up having a muscle milk light for "dessert." This morning's breakfast was 2 eggs with 1/4 of an everything bagel, 1/4 of an avocado, a medium tomato, and 3 strawberries. I thoroughly enjoyed it!!

I hope you have a good weekend!

Same thing, different POV

If you don't read Sean Anderson's blog, I highly encourage it.  He spends a lot of time talking about the mental aspects of losing and keeping off weight.

Sean talks about not letting his "life streams" cross - so if there is a stressful situation in his life, not allowing it to affect his eating. I approach that from a slightly different angle.

First of all, there are some events in life you simply cannot control - they are going to happen. People say 'you can control your response' - well yeah, to some extent. It's easy to let something like getting cut off in traffic roll off your back (at least for me), but what if your spouse were diagnosed with an illness or you lost your job? There are certainly things you can do to help mitigate falling into a pit of stress, but let's face it: those things are stressful!

Having said that, I take a 2 pronged approach to life's stresses, with the first being: controlling my reactions. Easier said than done at times, but I've made good inroads on not letting life's ups and downs control my food intake. I have found that for me, it's far easier to work on handling the stress than prong #2: controlling my emotional eating.

Sean talks about #2 a lot, but I think really you have to work on both.

I had a good workout at the gym last night - I did double snatches for the first time! I typically do one arm snatches. So go me!

I am heading down to the beach right after work. :-)  My plan is to pack my dinner rather than buying something on the road. I am doing really well with recording my food & exercise to share with the trainer.

Take care.

You never know when it'll click for you

I've written before about the fact that my experience has been a bit different. So many times when you read  a weight loss story (or a blog about losing weight), the person will say they were "always the chubby one", or words to that effect. Because that wasn't true for me, I guess it's given me a different perspective - and different set of luggage to work through. :-)

Like most women, I've spent the vast majority of my adult life wanting to "lose a few pounds". Maybe 10 or so? My mom always did, my grandma always did - I don't know that I really ever knew a woman who was happy with her weight or body.

But the reality is that I was always a healthy weight until I got pregnant, and afterward I lost weight (using Weight Watchers) and kept it off for several years. It wasn't until a combination of events when my son was 5 that I began to really become overweight: starting a new job and dating my now ex husband.

I have an Excel spreadsheet where I record my weight on Fridays. There are long stretches of time when there is no number recorded, but the first recorded weight is dated October 2001. (The weight is 178). I've been at this 18 years. I started this blog 15 years ago!

So:

I started at 178, lost down to the 150s, and stayed there for 7 months.
I popped up for a month into the 160s, then
back down to the 150s for 32 months before
going back to the 160s, where I stayed for 9 months.
Then there's a long 3 month period with no record, before
I resurface at 180. Other than a couple of weeks, it's 19 months before
I move back to the 170s in March of 2009.
For a year or so I'm pretty solid in the 170s with a flirt here and there in the high 160s.
End of April 2010 I hit 180s again.
I languish in the 180s for 8 months, but I turn it around and begin moving back into the high 170s.

January of 2011 they announce our center is closing. I am forced to move if I want to keep my job. That's the first time my husband threatened to leave (Why didn't I let him go!??!?!?). And then I gave up.

Jan 7, 2011 - 178.6 No weight recorded until
April 1, 2011 188
June 3 I hit the 190s for the first time since being pregnant.
November 2011 I begin to turn it around and go back into the 180s.
April 2012 I see the 170s again!
October 2012 I see 180s again.
Feb 2013 back to the 190s.
Dec 27, 2013 I cross into 200+ territory for the first time in my life and except for a couple of dips, I stay there until
November 2014 I make it back below 200.

At that point I'm back in NC, working, and feeling pretty good about things. Not great (I was swimming in the river of denial for sure), but being back here was so much better.

I'm moving downward slowly, then my husband and I split in March 2015.

Between March 6 and August 2016 there are 8 weeks I recorded a weight, but by November 2015 I'm back above 200.

12/15 I cross 210 for the first time.
12/17 I cross 220.
1/12/18 I hit my all time high weight - 222.

So, what happens next?

By the Friday after my 52nd birthday (4/20/18) I was down 9.4 pounds - to 212.6. So I was losing maybe 3 pounds a month. But I was beginning to feel like I could do this and I decided that this time there was no quitting, no "dieting" my way back up and down the scale. I might have setbacks, I might stall, but I was going to keep moving forward. I have had setbacks and I have had stalls, but today I weigh 68 pounds less than I did on that all time high day.

What changed? How did a perimenopausal woman in her 50s lose weight? I think there are a couple of things that were different this time.

• Surviving the divorce. For one I felt safe in my relationship, but (maybe more importantly) I decided that I was not going to allow my reactions to someone elses emotions dictate my relationship with food. I was going to be the one controlling me. My marriage isn't perfect, my job, my life, my family - all imperfect. And sometimes I DO eat my feelings. But I don't do it regularly. And I strive to keep my life in a place where I don't feel the need to stuff down feelings.

• Something that I alluded to back at the beginning I think maybe gave me an edge. I had been a soldier, I had been an athletic civilian, I knew how people treated and related to me at a "normal" weight. So I knew what to expect - both good and bad. That helped me prepare for the bad (unwanted attention) and anticipate the good (the awesome feeling of being physically fit).

Yeah, I wish I'd been able to do this sooner. I regret spending a decade and a half overweight - a lot of it really overweight. OTOH, I am also deeply grateful that I was able to make the change and not simply continue on the upward glide path.

All of this is a long way to say: Don't give up. Never give up. Look at all those fits and starts, those years of struggle. Do what you can to build the foundation of readiness and keep trying until it clicks for you.

I wish you all the best of health.

Lovely day

It is sunny and 72 here - no wonder no one was at the gym at lunch! LOL

I went to the kettlebell gym last night, then went home, had a nice supper, took a bath, then watched some TV with my husband. it was lovely. :-)

Today I did 30 minutes on the elliptical at lunch (which I also did yesterday), but no gym tonight. Tonight I'm going home to walk dogs and work on a sewing project.

Food is going well, exercise is going well, and weight is slowly moving downward. It feels like it will be forever before I get out of the 150s - it is SUCH a big milestone for me, for so many reasons. And it feels attainable!!!!  I am so determined to see it that the desire does make it easier to stay on course when I am tempted.

Sunday we are going out for dinner - a family celebration with T's family. We are going to a very good Japanese steakhouse. My plan is to 1. ignore the noodles 2. order extra vegetables 3. eat half the protein and veg 4. eat 1/4 c rice 5. take the rest home.

Have a good day!

Good weekend

T is finally starting to feel better about his new job - for a while last week he was feeling really overwhelmed. You know that feeling when you are learning something new and you're in the middle of it and you feel like you aren't getting anywhere? Then all of a sudden the skies part and you feel like you are farther along than you thought? Yeah, that happened.

Friday we went out to eat at a Japanese place - I had most of a sushi roll, a couple of pieces of T's tempura, half my hibachi (but just a couple bites of the rice), and 2 glasses of wine. So my weight was up a pound - totally not surprised.

Saturday I went to the gym and here is what I did:

I am sore from all the squats, but it's all good! Saturday was loads of errands all in different locations, so I put a lot of miles on my car. By the time I got home at 3:15 I was DONE.

Sunday I bought groceries and went to church to help out with lunch - it was so nice to be back there. The afternoon was mostly food prep for the week. I've been writing down my food and some Fitbit stats to share with the trainer at the gym. I've enjoyed keeping a paper journal! Who knew??

Anyway, here's another shot of my hydrangea:

My azaleas are in terrible shape (I think we are going to just pull them out) and I don't have any gardenias (may favorite), so I console myself with this very gorgeous hydrangea - my 2nd favorite shrub.

Have a good day!

TGIF

This has kinda been a week of Mondays! Lol. Crazy, but good. Went to the gym again last night and had another good workout - I'm so happy to be back there.

Weight is down 2.2 pounds this week, so maybe I've gotten back on the loss wagon. :-) I am now under 155 - a big psychological milestone for me. The next one - back into the 140s - is HUGE.

Busy weekend ahead - lots of errands etc.

Take care.

My triumphant return

Here's a better view of the door. Kinda tough to see, but the door actually matches the hydrangea! So pretty.

Last night I went back to the kettlebell gym. It was so fun! I had such a great workout and it was a prefect one to return to - challenging but familiar with a good chance to work on good form:

I did the entire workout using 26 and 20 pound bells in roughly 40 minutes. Pretty good! Since Anytime only has 1 bell of each size I haven't been able to do doubles (one bell per hand) since I left this place of wonder and joy.

And like Amy, I didn't let my husband's grouchiness when I got home get me down. Go me!

Have a good day!

A day of food

Sunday's food:

Breakfast: The other half of last night's steak & sauteed mushrooms with reheated squash, green beans, and some egg noodle for fast carbs (I ate this after I did the yard work and I was a bit shaky, which is unusual for me).

Not pictured: mid morning snack of 2 prunes with 1/2 tsp each of peanut butter and a sprinkle of cocoa powder.

Lunch:
Pan sauteed chicken tenders with leftover corn and asparagus.

Afternoon snack was a 100 calories Muscle Milk light.

For dinner we went out - I had a tossed salad, 2 wings, and half a small stromboli.  Up 2 pounds.

I am getting very frustrated. :-(

Bodies in Motion

Do you remember that show?

I loved it. I used to work out to it after I moved back to NC from Hawaii - I enjoyed the familiar locations.

Even though I said I wasn't going to the gym, don't think I've been sitting around!

This morning's workout:

Yesterday's workout:

The doors are both the same color - it's a really nice periwinkle. The photo color is much truer on the den door. The step looks better in person than the photo - it isn't perfect since it's at a transition between oak floor and knotty pine walls. I used the correct vintage stain, but the pine step is new wood so lacks the same patina. But it matches the quarter round, so pretty pleased.

I also finished planting herbs. I wanted to get the outside stuff done before it gets hot. Next up is mopping the den and kitchen and washing Jordan. Good times.

Take care.

Diet v Exercise

I read "Diet determines the size of your body, exercise determines composition", and I have to say I believe that.

This week I've just been really tired. I've been walking a lot and been busy, but I've only gone to the gym once. I've tried to be extra mindful of  my eating in the interim. This weekend is crazy. T works Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. I'm using the time to paint the front and back (den) doors, stain the step into the den, wash the dog, take T's car into the body shop, plant the tomato & herb plants I bought, oh and cook at church and shop, food prep, laundry, tidy. Whew! I just don't feel like I have the time or mental head space to go to the gym! And yes, I could certainly *make* the time, but I want to knock out some stuff around the house, so I'll take walks and watch my food - then get back to it after this weekend.

Have a good one!

Busy, much needed day

I worked at home yesterday since I had a dental appointment. It was lovely. I worked quietly on work stuff, then quietly on house stuff. I had minimal human interaction, which was just what I needed to re energize myself. This weekend I have several house projects to tackle and I am really looking forward to it.

I hope you have a terrific Memorial day Weekend!

Down 1.3 pounds this week - turning it around!

Tighten up

Last night T and I rode to Lowe's to pick up a few things I needed for the weekend: a hedge trimmer (ours broke), a palm sander (I am planning to paint the front and den doors this weekend), a couple of dill plants, and of course the annual tomato plant to kill. Lol. I love home grown tomatoes. LOVE. A tomato sandwich is one of the finest foods on earth as far as I'm concerned. Every year I try to grow tomatoes and every year I fail. I feel a bit like Charlie Brown and the football, and yet I persist.

While we were riding we discussed the gym situation and I decided to go back to the kettlbell gym for now. I have a lot of stuff going on and I don't want to spend mental space learning something new & establishing a new routine - I already have enough change. And for training density (more work, less time), it's hard to beat kettlebells. Since I still have fat to burn, training density is important! I am going back tomorrow.

In the meantime, I can control my food. So I am back to tracking in Sparkpeople. First thing in the morning I enter what I plan to eat up until (if not through) dinner. My target is 1600 calories. Right now I am just monitoring my macros, if I need to adjust I will.

Another tweak is that now T isn't teaching, I don't pack him a lunch. Add to that he is in training which means homework and studying in the evening, so his time & energy is limited. It makes sense that I prep my breakfast, snacks, and lunches for the week - they are the same every day. Last night's dinner made 4-5 portions (home made "fried" rice), so we ate it last night and we'll eat it again tonight. Tomorrow I'm making beef stroganoff, which we will eat for 2 nights. We don't mind, although it does mean a bit less variety. but for now that is just fine.

Take care.

Workout funk

As much as I've gone on and on here about my kettlebells, it may surprise you when I say I am in a workout funk. I have felt no excitement lately. Oh, I've been checking in with regular half assed workouts, but I haven't really pushed it.

I'm trying to decide if I want to go back to the kbell gym for a while or try something new. Pros and cons to both choices, but I need to do something. On the plus side, I've been getting out and walking more. I've even done some yard work people, which I hate with a white hot passion. lol

Baked salmon and salad for lunch. Yum.

New scale, new day

Trip to Georgia was long but fine. Lots of traffic on the road since colleges were graduating. Also, picked up a HUGE screw in the tire and had to get it plugged on our way out of town Sunday morning, so our departure was delayed. Alma is slowing down and her memory is even worse. But she enjoyed the lunch we took her and the cupcakes we took everyone for dessert with dinner. I'm always glad we went, even if I could use the time at home.

T went to Costco and bought us a new scale, so I can now be reasonably certain I weight 157.7. So I've gained a pound and a half since my birthday April 19th. In other words, I've maintained for a month. Okay, I'm trying to be philosophical about this: I've had a lot going on and I've maintained. It's given my body a good long break from losing weight. Also I haven't been going to the kettlebell gym and I miss it and I know it pushed me. We quit when T quit his job, but I'm planning to rejoin.

So now it's time to refocus. 8.5 weeks until vacation and I would LOVE to have lost 7.8 pounds by then!

Food for the day is plugged into Sparkeople.

Take care.

Reset

I'm tired, exhausted tired, and somewhat overwhelmed. To take the edge off the grumpy I get snarky. When pushed I tend to say crazy stuff like "No", "I can't do that", "Your request isn't reasonable." So that's where I'm at today.

Also I am currently hating my workouts. All of them.

And someone left a box of pecan turtles in the break room and I may have stuffed one into my mouth and swallowed quickly before I could decide that it wasn't worth 85 calories.

Despite an IUD and perimenopause I started a period today, so I am blaming the last 3 weeks on hormones. I will ride that excuse until I return to something that bears some passing resemblance to sanity.

Have a good one.

Where to even start?

Let's see....

Plumbing to washer is broken. Scale is broken. New company president coming on site today. Out of town this weekend. Mom coming for said out of town trip tomorrow.

Honestly, exercise and my food plan are keeping me sane, but yesterday I nearly dove face first into a store bought cake I normally wouldn't even look at twice.

I'm not one to wish my life away but next Monday is looking pretty good.....

Back to what passes for normal around here

Either mom's scale is off, or mine is. Anyway, up a pound and a half? Something. In any case, back to normal - eating, exercise, & sleeping. That'll be nice!

Take care - hope your weekend was amazing.

Crazy weekend, busy week

Wedding, winery visit, errands. This week is blood work, travel, graduation, party. It's busy. It's easy to lose focus when life throws you a bunch of "out of ordinary" events. Walking the line between enjoying a taco at a wedding reception & going out for a wine tasting while keeping healthy is the line we all have to walk into order to maintain weight loss. To keep losing you've got to complete a gymnastics routine on the line. It's not easy, and I waffle sometimes, but I don't quit, and I try not to lose sight of the big picture.

It was a good weekend. 

I decided to go to Palm Beach Tan for a spray tan before the graduation. I'm glad I did it several days out since it feels a bit too dark. By graduation it should be a nice glow.

Too much tan IMO.

Wednesday I am going for some blood work to take my measles immunity level tested. Depending on your age, even if you were immunized as a child (which I was), you may not have sufficient immunity. A simple booster will fix it, so I am getting that done this week.

Take care!

Headed back down

I am within a half pound of my lowest recorded weight (this time around). I got up, got T out of the house and did my workout. I have a few errands to run today and things to do, but it feels good to have gotten my day off to a good start.

Make it a good one!

Turn the page

Why I blog - just writing about my frustration helped me break through. I had a good on plan day yesterday and packed great food for today. I am feeling MUCH better thanks to the antibiotic and had a good workout at lunch.

Onward and downward!

Every day I write the book

I used to love Elvis Costello. :-)

Every day gives us a chance to do something different or better.... or exactly the same! Lately I've been struggling with hunger. I mean actual hunger. And if I try to be too rigid during the day then things go sideways at night. But I've tried to be extra strict to make up for stuff like being out of town, dining out with family, etc. It's become a vicious, frustrating cycle with an end result of not losing or the scale going up. And I'm feeling anxious because I am going out of town again next week for my son's college graduation. And I'm taking ex MIL with me, and you know she makes me nuts.

And we're only talking 3-4 pounds, but I feel stuck. And I need to stop giving it so much power that its creating anxiety because that isn't helpful.

Also I have a sinus infection and feel like crap. I thought it was allergies but I finally broke down and went back to the doctor and now I have antibiotics. So at least maybe I will start feeling better!!

What I needed

While I love travelling and going out of town, I really needed some down time to re-center! Thankfully I made that happen this weekend, even though it was a busy one.

T's car got hit in the work parking lot last Thursday, so we are trying to find body shops to get estimates. And he needs new tires. So it's gonna be a very busy week before going out of town for the day Saturday to attend a friend's wedding. So some down time to just tidy the house, plan meals, and relax was just what I needed.

Saturday we went out to dinner with my in-laws to celebrate my birthday and MIL's birthday (yesterday). It was a lovely meal at a very nice restaurant. I was disappointed last Friday to realize that April was basically a wash - no weight loss. :-( And May is going to be busy, but I cannot let that derail me!

Breakfast was planned for the week: https://www.skinnytaste.com/egg-tomato-and-scallion-sandwich/

Snack is 1/2 c cottage cheese, 1/2 c frozen berries, 1 T chopped walnuts - half in the morning, half in the afternoon.

Dinners vary but are on plan, and lunches are leftovers. For lunch today I have steamed broccoli, diced rotisserie chicken breast, 1/2 c Barilla protein pasta and a lemon olive oil vinaigrette. Tonight's dinner is pintos & greens. Yesterday I did kettlebells, today is the elliptical plus some walk breaks at the office.



Make it a good one! :-)

Grumpy

I had a crappy day yesterday. I will make today a better day.

Take care.

I miss planning

I have a long history of planning and prepping meals in advance. It works for me on so many levels! So when I get back from out of town late like I did this past weekend, it's tough. Monday night I dug up some stuffed chicken breasts from the freezer (store bought) - I had one for dinner and one for lunch the next day. Yesterday's breakfast was a sandwich from Sheetz (gas station) - that was actually pretty good: egg, turkey sausage, and guacamole on a whole grain English muffin. Snacks were Muscle Milk Light. Dinner was leftover vegetarian chili out of the freezer. Sadly, by the time I got home yesterday I was utterly exhausted and wiped out and didn't feel like doing any food prep. I took a dose of NyQuil and crawled into bed at 8:30, although I did read a while.

When I woke up this morning at 5:15 I knew what I had to do: get my butt in the kitchen! LOL I got up and did food prep for about 45 minutes. I made coffee & tea, boiled eggs for snacks, spaghetti with homemade meatballs (meatballs and sauce were already available in the freezer, yay for cooking double batches!), protein pasta, and zucchini noodles for lunch, and I had an open face veggie burger on sprouted grain bread for breakfast. My weight is up a bit so I am tracking in Sparkpeople for the extra accountability. Yesterday I bought 2 bags of salad to stash in the fridge at work so I am pretty well set. T is in charge of dinners for the rest of the week. :-)

So back home, getting back into the routine, getting the holiday weight off. Feels good!

Take care.

I must be allergic to my house???

Got home last night, somewhat unpacked, and hit the sack. Woke up in the middle of the night - congested, nose running, throat raw from drainage. WTF!?!?! I went to bed feeling fine!! Is there something blooming here but not at the beach I'm allergic to? My house? I have no idea, but I slept for poop. :-(

ANYWAY. I am back at the office, T went in and finished up the paperwork for new job. So we are settling back in.

I am not a shopper. I generally hate shopping - most all shopping. It's one reason I'm so good at menu planning - because if I have a plan and a thorough grocery list, I can minimize my time in the store. But I'm going to a wedding to the 4th and needed a dress. Since I haven't worn a dress since my wedding and I don't remember before then, I knew whatever I bought wouldn't be worn much. Also there is a really good thrift shop near mom's place, so off we went.

I did some pretty serious shopping while at the beach. Not only did I need a dress, but it was much warmer at the coast than I was expecting, so I really needed some bottoms other than jeans, 1 pair of workout shorts, and a pair of capris that were too big. Thrift shop yielded 2 cute sun dresses and 2 pair of shorts. Goodwill yielded 2 skirts (who am I???). Target for undergarments (dude, the off brand spanx cost more than both dresses combined, not to mention the strapless bra!). Kohl's gained me a skort and workout top. Second thrift shop (unplanned, but it was across from the vintage home decor store I like) = 2 pair capris, workout top, and a swimsuit. Oh, and 2 pair of workout shorts when we went to W-M for shorts for T!

So yeah, set for clothes. And I didn't even melt down! I hit my limit a couple of times, but managed to wrap it up before I got panicky. Crowds tend to overwhelm me, as does shopping, so my ability to endure the combination is relatively brief.

Ironically, I was looking for some t shirts, didn't find any that fit well (the girl kind, not the usual cotton with something on it variety). Oh well!

Anyway, even though I seem to be allergic to it, its nice to be home. :-)

Return home - delayed

Our plan was to head home yesterday afternoon, but a friend needed someone to watch her kids today (husband flew out on a family emergency, baby sitter not available, and she HAD to go to work today). So T is over watching the kids while I work from mom's. We are headed home this evening. We have had a lovely vacation, but I can't lie - I am ready to be back into my routine. Over time it becomes increasingly more challenging to stay in my food routine in someone else's house. So I am ready. But it's been awesome. And no matter how much time I spend, I never get enough beach time!

Yay!

Down 2.6 pounds this week. :-) Okay, I'm outta here. Have a good weekend!

Checking In

Weather is lovely, having fun. Went to the beach yesterday. As Sean says, make the experiences the priority, not the food! LOL

There were 2 things I knew I wanted to eat while down here. The ice cream shop is open for the season and we went yesterday after the beach and I got one scoop in a cup. it was good but not amazing. I wanted to get a burger at Hang 10, so we are going there Sunday for lunch since they'll be open - so I get the burger I wanted and can make that our going out for lunch Easter, as opposed to having the burger one day and then going out for Easter lunch. Win!

Activity: Gym nearby I can use. Brought my kettlbell - used it yesterday. Walked the beach, and will go more of course!

Food: Yesterday baked some chicken and broccoli. Had that for lunch and breakfast today. Made a nice seafood meal with small new potatoes and asparagus for dinner last night. So lots of cooking at home happening and minimal eating out. While there are places I enjoy down here, its not about the food.

Okay, take care!

Almost outta here!

Yep, I'm already in vacation mode. :-) Even though its not a "big" one, we're headed to mom's for the next few days. I am very excited! If I don't post much you understand. :-)

take care.

No worries

Happy Monday!

Work priorities just got whammied, which is beyond frustrating, but whatever. I am on vacation after tomorrow :-)

T was offered the position he wanted so I am very excited for him. It's a big change, but in a positive direction. I am so glad that is falling into place!

I had a great weekend and I have a short work week! YAY!!!!!

Have a good one!

Holding steady

157 again today. Yes!

I knew it!

Yup, down a pound and a half today! LOL! Today I weighed 157, which puts me at 65 pounds lost. That feels amazing.

Okay, have a great weekend!

That darn scale

I am always honest when I record my Friday weigh in. But I admit when I was up 1.5 pounds this morning (carbs I had with dinner? Tough weight training workout?), I was sorely tempted to record yesterday's!! In short, 2 flat week. Pooh.

Turned the corner

I feel so much better today! I am definitely on the mend. How do I know? I actually felt like working out! LOL So that's good.

I changed up lunches this week. Typically its leftovers, but I decided to prep lunches this week as well. I'm having baked salmon, roasted green beans, and salad. That was the macros and calories are all planned out. Snacks and breakfast are the same. It's no hardship since its something I enjoy and its nice to know in advance what I'm having.

Take care.

Still miserable

And this is why my allergies are a mess. Yes, that is an actual photo! Tree sex is real in the south. LOL I have an appointment at the urgent care clinic just to be sure it hasn't morphed into a sinus infection or anything.

Take care.

Snacks

One thing I mentioned last time I found myself stuck was reducing snack size. This morning I wanted some dried fruit & nuts (a trail mix, but without the junky stuff), so I measured out 100 calories worth. Yeah, that's why you always read that nuts are good but you have to watch the portions. It was tiny! That's okay - I enjoyed it and that will tide me over until lunch (baked chicken and salad).

I slept horribly Sunday night - my allergies are a mess right now. We are in a pollen alert and don't I know it. Last night I was exhausted - I went to bed at 8:30! I'm taking Allegra and using Flonase. Last night I broke down and took some NyQuil gelcaps. (Sunday night I kept waking myself up coughing and sniffling.) I slept better but my sinuses are still a mess. I don't know if its because I'm getting older, the pollen is worse this year, or both. In any case, I'm hoping it will improve soon.

Take care.

Operation unstuckification

Clearly that isn't a word, but it's what I plan to do this week!! My weight is loitering right around 159 and hasn't moved much in the past couple of weeks. This week I plan to carefully monitor my eating and make sure the calories I get are good ones, push it in the gym, and work on getting plenty of rest and water. If I can do those things, then I believe I will get the results I want!

Make it a good day! :-)

Same old

Well, I've certainly been consistent this week! Yesterday was a really good, on plan food day and an excellent workout. Up 0.2. Eh, just gonna stay the course and wait for things to settle out.

Have a good weekend.

Half empty or half full?

The scale says what it did last Friday: 158.6. Should I be frustrated it's not going down (even though I'm doing pretty well!) or glad that despite all the stress it isn't going up?????

Better

Today is a better day. For one, having a good night of sleep certainly improves my attitude! T has an interview today, and one tomorrow. I'm hoping he finds something better soon.

Slugging out that workout at lunch yesterday made me realize that I am not, will not, allow my feelings or my lack of  motivation set me back. I may not make forward progress as quickly, and that's fine, but no throwing in the towel just because life has handed us a few lemons. Last night my sweetie took my car to the gas station to fill it up and ask me if I wanted a beer or anything. (He got a soda and I think he was looking for a partner in crime). I said no thanks and moved on.

Take care, and I will too.

Difficult day

Yesterday my husband had a really hard day. Even though he made the right decision (and he knows that), he is just incredibly sad. Teaching was a dream and had been a long time. And he gave it up not because he didn't like it or didn't like the kids - it was simply due to the horrible way in which our education system in this state is broken. And of course he is worried about finding another job, even though we have savings for several months so we aren't in any immediate danger of not being able to pay bills or anything.

According to my Fitbit I got 3.5 hours of sleep last night and today I am having the really rough day emotionally. I went to the gym and eked out 30 minutes of a passable kettlebell workout. I went to the grocery to pick up a lime to squeeze into my water and (barely) managed to avoid walking out with some buffalo chicken salad from the deli. I brought a perfectly fine lunch, but I seriously wanted to comfort eat.

I'm hoping posting about it here will help. I made the mistake of posting last Sunday "things are in a good place". And now they most certainly aren't, but I have to somehow stay focused and not allow my feelings to take over so that I sabotage all my efforts.

Take care.

Nice but quick weekend

Our plan for the weekend had been to go down to my mom's and from there head out with friends for a day event. Thursday I talked to my friend and she was having a serious case of being overwhelmed. So, we shifted gears and still headed down, but instead of going anywhere we hung out at their house. T made everyone an awesome lunch and I helped with closet decluttering. Sometimes if you can get just one thing looking better, it really lifts your mood, you know? Any this was a case where listening to her vent helped, but going down and helping her get started helped too.

My friend has gained some weight so I took my newest donate pile down. As she went through her stuff, I tried on her donate and she tried on mine. I'd never done that before, but we both ended up with a few new things! At the end of the day she had a much cleaner closet and a much better outlook. And we all had a really nice day!

Now we're back home and although I came home with a few new things (which was cool because we do have somewhat different taste and it lets me try some new things!), I also came home with a renewed determination not to keep things just because they fit.

I took Saturday AND Sunday off from formal exercise. Scale was up a half pound this morning. Back to the gym at lunch today of course. I did 30 hard minutes on the elliptical.

Take care.

New low, epic workout

Today's weight: 158.6, for a loss of 1.6 pounds this week.

This morning's workout - 900 kettlebell swings in 45 minutes.

Have a good weekend!

What a week

This week has been crazy. Without going into too much detail, my husband resigned from his job Tuesday. he has very good reasons, I totally support the decision, and he's been a pile of stress for a while. Still, it's both unfortunate and unexpected.

I'm still here, doing my best, which hasn't been 100% but has been (mostly) heading the right direction.

Take care.

Today's skirt

Good morning. Today I am wearing a skirt. Other than the funeral, I don't even remember the last time I wore a skirt. I bought this skirt at the Goodwill near my mom's old house. I'm guessing I bought it in 2015. It was "a little small", but it's a really cute wrap around jean skirt and so for $4 I bought it for "someday." Then of course I turned around and gained another 20-25 pounds and that skirt seemed a million miles away, but I would run across it occasionally in the back of the guest room closet.

As I lost weight, I began trying it on periodically. Today was the magic combination of it fitting well enough + the weather being warm enough that I am wearing it. Small victories.

I am headed for the kettlebell gym Wednesday and I have asked the trainer to redo my measurements - they haven't been done in a couple of months.

I have a meeting that is going to run late so I am meeting a friend for dinner on the way home. We don't get to catch up very often (she works crazy hours!), so that will be fun. T will be already gone to band practice even if I went straight home anyway.

This weekend was really good. I got a bunch of mending done, and pinned the hem in our bedroom curtains, not to mention grocery shopping, food prep, and general tidying up. We had the house opened up and it always feel so fresh & clean after that. T replaced the guts in one of our toilets - they crumbled as he took them out!! So yeah, a lot of leaking going on! He's doing the other one some evening this week. Our water bill has been creeping up and we think this is likely the culprit. Oh! And he mowed the yard.

So an awesome, productive, fun weekend that I feel so good about.

Take care.

Lucky day

Wednesday at lunch I went to Goodwill - to look for some slacks for my great aunt and a stroller for my dog. No luck on the stroller front, but I found 2 nice pair of spring slacks to include in her Easter gift package. While I was there I also looked to see if they had any jeans - I had 2 pair at home that fit but I missed my black pair. I found 6 pair I liked in my size and took them to the dressing room. 1 was tiny, 2 were too big, 2 were okay but the waist was too big, and one was just right. Lol! So for a whopping $5 I have a pair of black jeans again. Yay!

Workout yesterday was good. I spent my 30 minutes doing a pretty brisk and heavy kettlebell workout that included swings, snatches, cleans, presses, squats, and Turkish get ups. I told the trainer that it was get up day and she replied "I'll pray for you." Lol, she's told me more than once how much she hates them and how hard she thinks they are (because they are tough!!). So a really good workout.

This weekend is more spring cleaning, yard work, and staining the step down into the den. Just call me Cinderella.

Have a great weekend!!

Milestone

I crossed into the 150s today. That is pretty darn HUGE for me.

Boringsville

Not too terribly much to say. Our workout was great last night, but then we came home to a cold, raw soup because the crock pot died. :-( We grabbed a bite out and I bought a new one first thing this morning. I use my crock pot all the time, so that was a necessity!

I'm losing about a pound a week. I know that's a good speed, but given that I have 20-ish to go it feels like it will take forever. I know that's not true, and I know that I'll never really be "done" in the sense that if I want to stay at a healthy weight and fitness level, there always needs to be new challenges.

Next week I am going to have the trainer do my measurements again - I haven't had them done in a couple of months and I'm curious to see how that's progressing.

Take care.

Ironing. So much ironing.

Here's the thing about doing 6 loads of laundry - a lot of which is work type stuff that you can't simply toss in the dryer: First your house will look like a laundry with shirts and sweaters hanging everywhere! Then you will feel like you work in a laundry as you iron all the things.

Most of my stuff is wash and wear, but I do have some nice things that need to be pressed. In the greater scheme, it means maybe twice a month I have a couple of shirts to iron. But since I washed everything all at once, and because my older stuff is nicer (my old job was much dressier), there is a lot. I ironed several shirts last night, and I have a few more yet to do, as well as 3 casual linen dresses. But I am slowly getting all those clothes organized and put away. At the end, all my clothes will be in a closet or dresser - no more tubs (yes, TUBS) of clothes. I will have exactly 1 tub of too small clothes, and hopefully not for much longer!!

Yesterday was a cardio day. Tonight is the kettlebell gym. Today I am meeting a friend for lunch at a Mexican restaurant, but I will make good choices. :-) No undoing all my efforts by mindlessly eating the chips! Lol

Have a good day!

Super productive weekend

I tackled the house situation head on: we worked really hard Saturday and got A LOT of spring cleaning done! Floors, dusting, washing dog beds, etc etc. Things are feeling so much better! I am still facing another busy weekend, but I feel like a weight is off my shoulders.

One really big thing I tackled was my clothes. I went through everything in my guest room! At the end of the day Saturday I had 1 tub of clothes that are too small, a new stack of clothes to go to Goodwill, and 6 loads of laundry sorted on the tub. I washed everything, organized and put it away, and my plan is to wear everything. Figure out what I like, what I don't, and continue to pare down.

Yesterday we helped with lunch at church, took a nap, and did food prep for the week. So it was a lot of work, but it feels really good.

Have a good week!

Short break

Got up, finished the grocery list, did the shopping. Dropped by car off for an oil change. Came home, we ate lunch. T got most of the vacuuming done before lunch. After lunch he headed out to run errands and I continued to clean. I am sitting down for a short break. We aren't anywhere close to done but I already feel like 50000% better!  I love a clean house, I wish I had time to keep it as clean as I'd like, but honestly I have other things to do as well - including fun stuff!

Have a good weekend!